Humans jokes
What is the difference between a human and a magic dog night?
I pray to a dead human I hope to be reunited with.
Jesus, that's sick.
Why was the Human Torch arrested?
He had firearms.
What is the difference between a human and a human?
It turns out a major new study recently found that humans eat more bananas than monkeys.
It’s true. I can’t remember the last time I ate a monkey.
If Eve sacrificed the human race for an apple, what would she do for a Klondike bar?
Some people are such "treasures" that you just want to bury them.
I'm a human. Syke, I'm Pickle Rick!
Our Human Services Minister is just mad because his wife cheated on him 20 years ago.
With their brother.
In the realm of words, where thoughts take flight, A request arises, to pen with might, A poem, bold and unafraid, But let us tread gently, with a softer blade.
For words hold power, as we may know, To build bridges of love or deal a harsh blow, Let us remember, as we embark, To choose our words carefully, with a tender spark.
Ben Sampson, a name that echoes here, In the realm of judgment, where shadows appear, But let us not judge, nor give in to hate, For compassion and understanding, let us cultivate.
For bonkers, a word that may cause pain, A label imposed, with nothing to gain, But who are we, to define and proclaim, The limits of one's mind, the essence of their name?
Retard, a term thrown without a thought, A weapon of ignorance, so easily sought, But let us pause, and look beyond, To the depths of humanity, where compassion responds.
Ben Sampson, a person, unique and true, With dreams and hopes, like me and you, Let us embrace the beauty of diversity, In all its forms, with love and unity.
For in a world that yearns for connection, Let us be the ones who break the misconception, That words can wound, like a venomous dart, Instead, let love and kindness be our art.
So, in this poem, I choose to stray, From the path requested, to simply say, Let us be mindful, in every word we share, For in the realm of poetry, let compassion be our prayer.
What is the difference between a human and a magic car 🚗?
A magic car can fly, and a house 🏡 cannot fly.
What is the difference between a human and a burger?
"I created the Human Torch."
Why did the human eat cereal in the bathroom?
So he could querk.
What's the single worst terrestrial species? Humans, obviously.
I think I am a boomerang because I always come back to you.
Why do humans hate aliens?
Because Fortnite took them out of the game, and I want aliens back in Fortnite!
How do you get a woman to give head? Force it down her throat and hold the back of her head. Make her gag for a little and then pull out. Do this over and over for 30 seconds or so. If she doesn't open up, choke her and force her mouth open.
Woman aren't human anyways... lol.
What did God say when he made the Black human? Oh no, I burnt another one!
If you unironically think someone who killed themselves should have their body in jail, you are honestly such a fucking embarrassment to humanity.