A teacher walked up to me and said, "How did we get butt cracks?"
I was like 4, so I said, "You had an earthquake on your booty."
Bootylicious lol
I was in the Sahara Desert, dying of thirst. Thankfully, Pionel Pessi, the debut man, came to my rescue👨‍🚒. He brought in 100's of helicopters filled with bottles to quench my thirst. I asked him how he had so many bottles; "big games," he replied. Thanks for saving my life, my idol.
At 5 years old, I already knew how to throw paper airplanes thanks to my Arabian relatives!
How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck? When you pull her pants, her ass.
How do Chinese parents name their children?
Dropping a pan down the stairs. Bing, Bong, Dong.
How cool is NASA?
Not cool at all.
How do you get an orphan sad?
You say you will tell their mom that they have been a baaaaaad boy.
Kile: Hey, asshole! I bet you listen to trash 50 Cent! How about you get to quarters, listen to him! My favorite rapper is the best of all! How about you go eat a cracker, you parrot nose, fuck!
Remy: I'm... y-y... YOUR DUMBER THAN ANT! I BET YOUR FAVORITE RAPPER IS A CANDY RAPPER!!
I don't give two shits about how evil these are. They're funny.
How do you call a very long terrorist?
9/11.
How do rappers keep their breath fresh?
With some FRESH BEATS.
How do rappers stay cool during summer?
They throw SHADE
How does a rapper keep track of time?
With his RHYMING WATCH
How do you saw an apple with no mouth?
A P P L E
How did Steven Hawking die?
He lost internet connection.
How do you quiet a baby down?
Make baby back ribs for dinner.
How does he go for a poo? He logs out.
Student: There are 505 rocks in a car. If 8 fall out, how many are left?
Teacher: There will be 497 rocks left.
Student: Ok!!
Student: How do you put an alligator in a closet?
Teacher: You can't, it won't fit.
Student: No!! Just open the door, put the alligator in, then close the door.
Teacher: Ohhh, now I get it.
How is being gay like a geology class? You get to lick all the rocks you want
I once was sitting outside and watched the birds go by. I checked my watch and said, "My, how time is FLYING by!"
