Howe jokes
Why do orphans not know how to spell?
Because no one likes them, dumb people. đź¤đź¤ˇ
How did Technoblade actually die?
He got stabbed!
I am curious how many likes this will get.
LIKE IT!!!!!
How much curry can an Indian eat? Until his red dot explodes.
Random guy: Hi, how old are you?
Me: 15
The guy: You're so young, age is just a number.
Me: Do you know what else is a number?
The guy: What?
Me: 911
Memes
My cousin be like :
How did the villagers identify the masked rapist?
He was the only one in the village who believed the victim.
Q: How much does a skeleton weigh?
A: A skele-TON.
What’s the difference between me and Chester Bennington?
I know how to use an exercise band.
Hi, how are you? Are you good?
How [does] a disabled kid face [the] Jalalas?
He can't run, just hug the bomb.
How many babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? More than 40 because my basement is still dark.
How many degrees does it take to change ice into boiling water?
199, because the difference between -100 and +100 is 199 (excluding the zero, because it's not real and it doesn't exist because it's not real).
Get?
How do you make a baby cry?
You punch it in the face.
How ISS greets their friend.
"You the BOMB!"
Q: How many dogs does it take to shingle a roof? A: It depends on how you cut 'em.
How do you know a gay guy has been in your house?
There are speedos in the microwave.
A child asks his father, "How do you get pink eye?"
Son, I was told it’s from scratching your butt, then rubbing your eyes.
Then the son asks, "How did I get Fungi?" As the father was about to answer, the boy says, "Ohh, so is it from scratching my stinky feet, then rubbing my eye?" ———-Fungeye
How do you tell when your wife is dead?
The sex is the same, but the dishes pile up.
My dad came over late at night. He was drunk. He started telling me how useless I was. Then I went to the kitchen, grabbed a knife, and stabbed him in the chest 47 times.
Three minutes later, he died. Now I’m losing my mind and cutting myself.
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
What does a baby computer call his father? Data!
What do you call a bear without any teeth? A gummy bear!
Why did the golfer change his pants? Because he got a hole in one!
Does anyone need an ark? I Noah guy!
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money. He just stands there applauding and saying “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.”