Howe jokes

Difference

What's the difference between a prostitute and a trash bag?

There's a limit to how much trash goes in the trash bag.

Priest

How can you tell the difference between a Christian priest and a zit?

One waits until you're twelve to come on your face.

Racecar

"Racecar" spelled backwards is "racecar," but "racecar" sideways is how Paul Walker died.

Name

How do Chinese people get their names? Their parents throw woks down the stairs and name their children after the sound it makes.

Memes

Baby

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, there are 69 in my basement, and it's still dark.

Dad

A dad asked his son what kind of cake he wanted for his birthday, and he replied, "How about a urinal cake?!"

Air

How did the air beat me at chess? It did that thing, haha!

Baby

How do you make a dead baby float?

Two scoops of ice cream, one scoop of dead baby!

Leg day

When your legs forget how to work after leg day, I can't climb the stairs.

Michael Myers right behind me. Runs like I'm a track star!

Snowman

How do you make a blond snowman? You can't, you have to hollow out the head.

Fellatio

What is one thing that a physicality handicapped gay man can do better than a heterosexual female or a bisexual female that are not born physicality handicapped? Know how to perform fellatio on a man that has a very long and thick and very large dick.

Kid

How do you keep a blind kid entertained?

You take him to a stadium crowd, then give him a bat and tell him to hit the piñata.

Orphan

Why do orphans not know how to spell?

Because no one likes them, dumb people. 🤭🤡

Number

Random guy: Hi, how old are you?

Me: 15

The guy: You're so young, age is just a number.

Me: Do you know what else is a number?

The guy: What?

Me: 911