You know whats the worst about having a daughter with cancer? You can't pull her hair when you hit it from the back
When is it acceptable to hit a dwarf? When he dances with your wife and says her hair smells nice....
This city slicker broke down on a country road, he look around and in the distance he spotted a farm house. When he finally got there he asked the farmer if he has a phone he could use because his had no reception. The farmer told him he could use it if he married his daughter. The guy said he really didn’t wanna get married and the farmer said if you marry my daughter I’ll give you half my farm...the guy said lemme see her...the farmer hollered “hey you” get over here...and she said duh ok. The ol boy looked at her and said nooo thank you. The father said I’ll give you all my farm and my bank account if you’ll marry my daughter....the ol boy thought for a minute and said “we’ll I guess I can put a sack over her head” So they married and the farmer kept his word and gave him everything. One day the guy was up fixin the roof and Holland hey you get me some nails...his wife said duh nails, nails he said yes nails and showed her one she said “oh dun nails nails” he said yes nails. So she got him some. He was hammering away when he hit his thumb and he yells oh F. . . It! and she turned and Hollered Duh A Sack A Sack Duh A Sack!
Three blondes were taking a walk when they stumbled on some tracks. They argued on what the tracks came from. One of them said “it’s a deer.” The other said it “No it’s a coyote.” The last one was going to give her thoughts, but that was when the train hit them.
Do you like Wendy's when dese nuts hit your face
Boy:crap I hit a deer Girl:awe...I guess It’s not so much of a dear Boy:...
Boy:get the hell out
So I told my sister want hear some jokes and she was like hit me with best shot fire away and I was like okay I know ur singing and old song yeah I was trying to see if u sing too and I said who do u think I am Chris brown Hi
Why did the child drop their icecream They got hit by a bus
Why was I stress eating on the train track?
To wait to get hit.
A FED EX plane was carrying 375 fridges across Africa but the cargo door wasn't shut properly but only 218 reached the desired destination. The rest landed in a remote village. How many fell out the plane?
Time's up! You took too long you only had 4 seconds to answer it.
How do you put an elephant into the fridge that pushed out the cargo door?
Open the fridge, put the elephant in and close the door.
How do you put a giraffe into the fridge?
Open the fridge, take out the elephant. Then put in the giraffe and close the door.
Why did sally fall off the swing?
Because she got hit by the other 156 refrigerators.
How did she survive?
Her idiot mother tried to pull her out and accidentally ripped both her arms off. But she was rescued 8 minutes later.
Two lions plan their escape from the circus. the night they get out of their cages they see a lone clown stumbling back from town, drunk, not a soul in sight. Since they are going on the run, they decide to catch one last meal before they hit the road. as one lion gets a bite of leg the second takes a piece of shoulder. Then one stops and asks his companion: Does this taste funny to you?
If you drop an emo and a piece of paper from a tree which will hit the ground first?
The piece of oaper because the rope will stop the emo
What do a blackjack dealer and my uncle have in common?
They both hit me face down on the table
Why can’t a orphan hit a home run Bc he doesn’t have a home
Look I didn't hit rock bottom I gracefully floated down there like Mary Poppins with an umbrella.
Orphans don't have parents!!1! ahahahaha ahahaha plz like and subscribe and hit that bell icon #logang #imagamerpersonwedontfuckwiththegenderbinary #wedontfuckingeneral #nofilter #rememberifyousubscribethenisubscribeback
New civil war themed porn title: “Harriet Tubman gets hit with something other than an iron ingot”
Everyone gangster till Helen Keller hits a 3 on you.
Why cant orphans play baseball?
they never hit home
Oh my god, she hit me with a bat,
Cause she was transgender.
