My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...
So I threw a coconut at her.
I asked the emo girl if she gets jealous when her phone dies.
I wondered why there was red all over my bathroom til I found out that my sis had dyed her hair red. Man, it looked like somebody died in there! Lol.
Yo mama is so fat that her wheelchair had to be made into a couch!
Me when my girlfriend comes home, I check her phone and there are 100 texts from a different guy asking her out, and her text says yes.
Get the whip, you're out!
Yo mama so fat,
Donald Trump himself tried to use her as his border wall in 2016.
Yo mama is so ugly, that her portraits hang themselves
yo momma is so fat I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing
When Helen Keller drives a car, people call her Asian.
Yo mama is so ugly that Rick Astley gave her up.
Your mom's so poor, she chased the garbage truck with her grocery list.
Yo mama is so retarded, they tell her it was gonna be chilly outside, she went and got a bowl!
Yo mama is so fat when she goes to the dentist, they make her lay face down.
Yo mama so stupid, she tried to fill her car with Vin Diesel.
Today I got a lecture from my mother, and congratulated her. Why?
Because she managed not to damage me in a physical fashion.
A guy is on trial for leading a mob to gang rape a woman he'd taken out for a date. His defense is that he was helping her live out a fantasy.
The DA is furious and asks him WTF gave him that idea. He said, "After the date I took her back to her house, pulled out my dick, and tried to hand it to her. She told me, 'You've gotta be fucking kidding me. Seriously, go get some help!'"
Yo mama's so ugly that Sonic needed to go fast to get away from her face.
Yo mama so fat that the US (Mexico) and North Korea (South Korea) got into a war fighting over who gets to use her as their border wall.
I gave Helen Keller an Oculus and AirPods for her 12th birthday, and she hated them and me.
My crush rejected me 2 years ago, and I still have never moved on. I'll be over her when a train is over me.
