Herring jokes

Yo mama so old, her birth certificate expired.

Yo mama so ugly, when she was born, the doctor tried to put her back in.

Yo mama so fat, when they buried her, they named her Everest. Mount Everest.

Yo mama so strict that when Ponyboy told her that Darry hit him, she called the cops on Darry.

Yo mama so ugly that when the Kool-Aid Man busted through her wall, he said, “Oh no!”

I saw a fat woman at the bus stop today, so I asked her, "When's it due?"

She replied, "I'm not fucking pregnant, you rude prick!"

I said, "I meant the bus, you fat cunt!"

My girlfriend broke up with me, so I stole her wheelchair. Guess who came crawling back?

You want to get her pregnant before marriage to know if she's fertile, so why not marry a single mother that already has proof?

My sis told me that onions are the only food that can make you cry...

So I threw a coconut at her.

I asked the emo girl if she gets jealous when her phone dies.

I wondered why there was red all over my bathroom til I found out that my sis had dyed her hair red. Man, it looked like somebody died in there! Lol.

Yo mama is so fat that her wheelchair had to be made into a couch!

Me when my girlfriend comes home, I check her phone and there are 100 texts from a different guy asking her out, and her text says yes.

Get the whip, you're out!

Yo mama so fat,

Donald Trump himself tried to use her as his border wall in 2016.

Yo mama is so ugly that her portraits hang themselves.

Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing!

When Helen Keller drives a car, people call her Asian.

Yo mama is so ugly that Rick Astley gave her up.

Your mom's so poor, she chased the garbage truck with her grocery list.

Yo mama is so retarded, they tell her it was gonna be chilly outside, she went and got a bowl!