Helen Keller deaf-initely faked it!
Why is Helen Keller's child blind too? She always fed it with a fork!
Why was Helen Keller's belly button bruised?
Her boyfriend was blind too.
Why did Helen Keller wear skin tight pants?
So you could read her lips.
Why can't Helen Keller drive?
Because she's a woman.
What part of the Earth does Helen Keller not have?
The sea.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They put her in a circle room and told her to find the penny in the corner.
Why did Helen Keller sign the n-word?
She thought she was black.
Why did Helen Keller's dog kill itself? I would too if all I heard was "daaaaaaah!"
How did Helen Keller lose her virginity?
I told her the plunger was stuck in the toilet, but she didn’t listen...
Why did Helen Keller’s boyfriend have wax on his finger? Because he was whispering sweet nothings into her ear!
Helen threw up gang signs her whole life and didn't know.
Why were Helen Keller's hands crippled?
From reading stop signs at fifty miles per hour.
Why doesn't Helen Keller's kid have ears? She gave it its first haircut!
Helen Keller is the kind of person to ask you what the time is.
How do you shut Helen Keller up?
You give her mittens.
POV: I made a blind joke.
"That isn't funny. What if Helen Keller saw that?"
How did Helen Keller lose her arm? She tried to read the stop sign at 100 MPH.
Why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide?
Well, I wouldn't want to be named "asdjasdjasdak" either.
Why doesn’t Helen Keller go to the optometrist?
Because she’s dead.
