Helen jokes
"Your mother has been with us for 20 years," said John. "Isn’t it time she got a place of her own?"
"My mother?" replied Helen. "I thought she was your mother."
What’s Helen Keller’s favorite game as a kid?
I spy.
How did Helen Keller dance? Very Bad.
How did Helen Keller draw? With her hand.
Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They put a plunger in the toilet.
Q: How many kids did Helen Keller have? A: None, the plunger went all the way up.
Why doesn’t Helen Keller go to the beach?
Because she can’t hear the sea.
How did Helen Keller drive?
One hand on the wheel, one hand on the road.
Why did Helen Keller fail school? She was bad at language.
Balalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!
Q: How did Helen Keller get a concussion?
A: She kept stepping on a rake.
Why did Helen Keller have no ornaments on her Christmas tree?
'Cause she always dropped them.
Helen Keller is the kind of person to ask you what the time is.
POV: I made a blind joke.
"That isn't funny. What if Helen Keller saw that?"
Why is Helen Keller's snatch always sore?
She wipes with a Brillo pad.
Why did Helen Keller's dog commit suicide?
Well, I wouldn't want to be named "asdjasdjasdak" either.
How did Helen Keller die?
Her ex gave her plutonium and told her to eat it.
How do you shut Helen Keller up?
You give her mittens.
Helen Keller was a pilot in 9/11.
Why was Helen Keller so bad at driving?
Because she's a woman.
Why did Helen Keller's dog run away?
You would too if your name was "Raraaaughhaugh."
Why did Helen Keller sign the n-word?
She thought she was black.