Helen jokes
Did you know Helen Keller had a dog? Neither did she.
Helen Keller fell down a well. She screamed and screamed until she was blue in the hands.
How did Helen Keller burn the side of her head? She answered the iron.
How'd she burn the other side? They called back.
Why did Helen Keller burn her hands?
Because she was trying to read the waffle iron.
How do you punish Helen Keller?
You leave the plunger in the toilet.
What is Helen Keller's favorite color?
Velcro.
Why couldn't Helen Keller eat her Big Mac?
She was too busy trying to read the sesame seeds.
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Unnecessary.
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They put doorknobs on a wall and said, "Open the door."
How did Helen Keller dance? Very Bad.
How did Helen Keller draw? With her hand.
Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow?
Her dog was blind, too.
Helen Keller picked up a cheese grater, it was the most violent story she'd ever read.
Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They put a plunger in the toilet.
Q: How many kids did Helen Keller have? A: None, the plunger went all the way up.
How do you confuse Helen Keller? You rearrange the furniture and glue doorknobs to the walls.
What is the definition of "Endless Love"?
Answer: Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder playing "Tennis"!
What did Helen Keller's mother do to her when she was mad at her?
She left the plunger in the toilet, she put doorknobs on all the walls, and she rearranged the furniture.
How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her? They handed her a basketball and told her to “read this book”.
Why did Helen Keller ride a broken roller coaster?
She didn't see anything wrong with it.
Q: Why does Helen Keller masturbate with one hand?
A: So she can moan with the other.
What do Helen Keller and orphans have in common?
Neither of them can see or hear their parents.