A man goes to the doctor. Says he's depressed. Says life seems harsh and cruel. Says he feels all alone in a threatening world.
Doctor says: "Treatment is simple. The great clown - Pagliacci - is in town. Go see him. That should pick you up."
Man bursts into tears, says "But doctor... I am Pagliacci."
Why did the ass go to therapy?
It couldn't deal with all the crap.
Down syndrome sucks!
What’s the difference between Texas and Flint, Michigan?
Nothing; no one cares how much lead is in the kids.
What does Can do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
I don’t know why I go to the gym. Being healthy is dying as fast as possible, and I really want to speed that shit up.
John pretended to be a doctor.
Motu came to him. He said, "I lost my hunger."
John brought some samosas for his lunch. Motu ate them. John said, "Your hunger is back!"
Then, Motu said, "I lost my taste."
John said, "Number 1, bring some water." Motu drank it and said, "This is petrol!" John said, "Your taste is back!"
Motu said, "I lost my memory."
John said, "Number 1, bring some medicine." Motu said, "But Number 1 brought water." John said, "Your memory is back!"
My therapist told me, "Time to heal all wounds," so I shot him in the nuts.
Now we wait...
Did you hear about the deaf guy's STI?
He got hearing aids.
Your dad is so f**king fat that when he bends over and comes back up, it's the next day.
Which is more disabling, is it autism or Down syndrome?
"ADHD is brainless and autism is braindead."
What do you call people with ADHD?
A brainless speeder.
In life, some people have it harder than others.
That's why Viagra exists.
What do priests give children?
Syphilis.
What do you call a rapper with a cold?
Lil Sneezy.
I bought my fat wheelchair son a treadmill for his birthday, then that big brainless special motherfucker cried over it and threw a fit cuz his fat special ass couldn't get up out of his wheelchair and said for Jesus to raise him up and give him working and movable legs.
I heard Steven Spielberg is coming out with a new movie about fat people called E.C.
(Extra Cholesterol)
What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Having arms and legs.
Doctor: "I'm sorry, but you suffer from a terminal illness and only have 10 to live."
Patient: "What do you mean 10? 10 what? months? weeks?"
Doctor: "9, 8, 7..."
