Health jokes
Miscarriage jokes aren't funny, just cut it out.
Every time I work late at the hospital, I help the patients sleep.
There isn't a snooze button on the beeping things, so I unplug them.
Why did Amy Winehouse snort Splenda?
She thought it was Diet Coke.
What’s a vegetable’s favorite dance?
The cabbage patch.
How did the cannibal know the girl he was eating for dinner had COVID-19?
She lost her taste.
Why are Christmas trees banned in mental hospitals?
Because the ornaments wouldn't be the only things hanging.
Why are there no chemists in Africa?
Because you can’t take tablets on an empty stomach.
What do Viagra and Disneyland have in common?
They both cause you to stand around for an hour waiting for a two-minute ride.
My friend called me fat, so I challenged him to a running race.
Scientists say a banana a day is great for the colon.
But you gotta eat it!
Why did the rapper join a gym?
To get those SICK BARS.
Which is more disabling, autism, ADHD, or Down syndrome?
Which of these is the smartest; also, list them too: Is it autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?
Which one gets bullied the most, autism, Down syndrome, or ADHD?
Hello, which do y'all think is more embarrassing to have, is it autism or Down syndrome?
What does Cangaball do after eating its vegetables?
Go on eBay to see how much he can sell the wheelchair for.
How do you lift a depressed person up?
No need, they'll find a way to get on the tree somehow.
Why did the booty go to therapy?
It had some DEEP-SEATED issues.
If you're fat and transgender, then would you be considered trans fat?
What do you call a javelin thrower with Parkinson’s?
Shakespeare.