Head jokes

What is the difference between men and women?

Men have 2 heads, women have 4 lips because men do all the thinking, and women do all the talking.

You're so bald that Disney uses your head for movie scripts.

Do you think John F. Kennedy went for a ride in Dallas just to clear his head because his wife said he was close-minded?

I wore a purple outfit to school, and some Indian kid called me Thanos, so I called him Vision and tried pulling the red dot off his head.

Your head is so big, it looks like traffic is able to fit on it!

I was riding my bike when I saw a man's head in the wheel. It was mine.

Take a step back... just like your hairline did.

"I have a three-head."

"I have a four-head."

Bald people have a seven-head.

Your forehead is so big that your mom stayed in the delivery room just to give birth to your head.

When your plane heads for New York...

Your forehead is so big that when you put glasses on top of your head, it falls off.

So many things are going through my head.

How am I not dead yet?

I was riding a bike with no helmet. I went and went with no helmet until... I broke my head with no helmet on!

A boy's hairline is always in the back of his head, and its shape is like a check mark.

I went to a tall girl and I asked her, "What do you do for a living?" She says, "An account." So I reply with, "An accounting the hairs on people's heads," and then I run away.

My mom told me to be positive...

I was heading to an HIV test.

I asked a man if I was the fastest gun in the west. He said my 17 wasn't good enough. After that, a lot of lead went into his head.

Good Morning, Sleepy-Head!

Mommy, Mommy, are you an archer?

"Shut up and keep the apple on your head still."

When I aim this trigger, it all goes red.

Do you have a bounty 'cause you got a "M" on your head?