Have jokes
My wife told me I could never, ever build a car out of spaghetti. You should have seen the look on her face when I drove pasta!
What is the difference between a dead body and a Lamborghini?
I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.
What does a depressed person and a chicken have in common? They both try to fly.
What does Kobe now have in common with his helicopter?
They both have torn rotators.
Why can't emos have ADD?
'Cause they are already scatter-brained.
Why don't orphans have any friends?
Because they don't have homies.
Why do people misplace 9/11 with emo kids? They both have a high death count.
I have a better method of abortion than currently used. It's like a regular one, except you can get free food out of it... We're about to give baby-back ribs a whole new meaning.
What does a baby and a grenade have in common?
They both make noise after you throw them.
Why did the orphan become a str1pper?
So she can have someone to call daddy.
Why do orphans stay home alone?
Because they don't have parents.
Orphans are the best people to bully. They have no parents.
Why do orphans not have cheese on their burgers? They don't have a dad to get milk.
Why is it hard to break up with a Japanese girl?
Because you have to drop the bomb twice for her to get it.
What is a thing orphans have that we can never have?
Imaginary parents.
What do orphans and police not have in common?
The police can actually go home.
What do Special Ed kids and fast kids have in common? They like to do things sped up.
I'm sorry, orphans, that you're getting bullied. Oh, I have to go, my MOM's calling me. We're going on a road trip to go to a FAMILY reunion!
Why do orphans not care about sleep? Because they have no one to wake up to.
Why can’t orphans be gay?
Because they have no one to call daddy.