Grief jokes
I've had conversations with many people. Some of them were drier than my dad's ashes.
Why did the orphan cross the road? (Not to see his mom or dad.)
Kid at school tells an orphan, "I fucked your mom."
Orphan: "What's a mom?"
What's a benefit of being an orphan? The chips always come in a family size :)
What do orphans call a family photo? A selfie.
What’s the difference between milk and the air?
At least the air will always be there for me.
Kid: Your mom!
Orphan: (cries)
Why do orphans eat cereal without milk?
Their dad never came with it.
"I'm sorry" and "I apologize" mean the same thing, except at a funeral.
Note to all.
My name is Lariah. Lariah Carla Brown, 14 years old and I am 1 of triplets. I don't understand how rape jokes are funny, and I just want to make that statement clear. I also hate orphan jokes because I WAS one. Notice when I put WAS! I also see jokes about cancer, now I know you can't be kidding. You know that cancer is a disease that many people get and could die from, so you are just wrong about that!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Charlie.
Charlie who?
Charlie Brown! Good grief!
So I told an orphan if her mom is hot, he wouldn't stop crying.
Why was Saudi Arabia sad during 9/11?
Because there were no more planes.
Why can't orphans get a home run?
Because they have no home to run to.
Daveon says, "Oh wow, she's so beautiful!" The doctor then says, "Yes, but sadly, your wife didn't make it..." Daveon then states, "Give me the one my wife made then!"
What’s the difference between an onion and a photo of a dead relative? Nothing, they both make you cry when you look at it.
A guy wins a free ticket to the Super Bowl and so he’s very excited.
However, he’s not so excited when he gets there and realizes his seat’s in the back of the stadium.
So he looks around him for a better seat, and to his surprise he finds an empty seat right next to the field.
He approaches the older guy who’s sitting in the seat next to the empty one and asks if the seat is taken.
The man replies, “No.”
The young guy is very surprised to hear this and asks, “How could someone pass up a seat like this?”
The older guy replies, “It’s my wife’s seat. We’ve been to every Super Bowl together since the day we were married but she’s passed away.”
“Oh, how sad,” the young guy says, taken aback. “I’m sorry to hear that, but couldn’t you find a friend or relative to come with you?”
“No,” the man replies, “They’re all at the funeral.”
Teacher: Everyone, tomorrow is bring your mom to school day.
Me: Sorry but my mom's not gonna make it.
Teacher: Why?
Me: I'm an orphan, bitch.
Q: Why did the orphan cross the road?
A: To get to the other side to find his parents.
There was no other side of the road.
Why couldn't the orphan play baseball?
Because he can't get home.
What do you say to the orphan?
"Shut up, get a mom and dad!"