George

George Jokes

Submarine

What’s the name of OceanGate’s next submarine?

Judging by the breathing conditions on their subs, I bet they’ll call it the "George Floyd."

Bacon

One morning, Peppy and George came downstairs for breakfast, but they got a plate of juicy bacon. Their dad had recently gone missing, so they ate it quite sadly.

The next morning, they went to school and asked their teacher, "What is bacon made out of?" The teacher replied, "Pigs, why?" Peppa and George looked horrified.

Song

What is George Floyd's favorite song?

"Wishing Well" by Juice WRLD.

Gorilla

What did George Washington Carver have anything to do with gorillas? It's a little possible, ya dummy!

Difference

What's the difference between Pink Floyd and George Floyd?

When Pink Floyd can't breathe, it's because all their fans are smoking pot.

Bill Clinton

Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship.

As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”

George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”

Bill Clinton asks excitedly: “Do we have time?”

Song

What's the best song to sing to George Floyd?

"I Will Survive," by Gloria Gaynor.

Difference

What’s the difference between Juice WRLD and George Floyd?

Nothing, they both can’t breathe.

Funeral

After I am dead during my funeral service, I want someone to play my favorite song by Boy George and Culture Club, "Church of the Poison Mind."

9/11

A retired George W. Bush is eating a donut at 7/11 and looks at it. "I'm so happy I did that." A guy overhears the conversation and says, "You're happy you bought that donut? Oh haha, I would be too. I love donuts!" George W. Bush then says, "Oh hahaha, you caught me," and then says, "Oh hahaha, you must have heard me wrong. I said, I'm so happy I did 9/11."

String

I was in my guitar class and my strings were dead, and then I realized they were more dead than George Bush on November 30, 2018.

Quarter

Why doesn't George Washington carry his ID?

Because he knows he can always ask for a quarter.

Football

I am a George Formby fan, and I love football. My favourite manager was Arsène Wenger. My favourite referee was Collina. My favourite player was Dean Windas. So my favourite George Formby song was "Wenger, Collina, Windas."