Friends jokes

Lego

    • I got a new Lego airplane set from my friend... oddly, there were also two towers included in the box as well.

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    Boob

    • Get a calculator.

    Okay, anyways, Sally has 69 bottles of boobs (because she is a cannibal that collects boobs) and her friend said it was 222 many. She got caught by the police and was taken to 51st Street. She got arrested for x8 days, so she was BOOBLESS.

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    • Movie

    • Hii! Oh my gosh. It has been forever! How have you guys been? Comment your favorite movie!!!! <3

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    Friend

    • My friends were worried that I was making suicide jokes so much, so I said, "Don't worry, you won't have to hear them much longer."

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    • Self Harm

    • Friend: Stop with the self harm jokes, they're not funny.

    Me: It's not that deep. I'll cut it out.

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    Self Harm

    • I was joking about self-harm to my friend, and she told me to "CUT it out!" I couldn't even laugh.

    When we were at the self-checkout, she started scanning my arms. I asked her what she was doing. She said, "Trying to see if it beeps, ya think I'd get it to work if I scanned your thighs?"

    I said, "Nah, bro, you'd overload the system if you put it there."

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    • Ladder

    • A friend took me out to his shed and was showing me all his tools, when he pointed to a ladder. "That's my step ladder," he said. "I never knew my real ladder."

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    Friend

    • One day I went to talk to my friend.

    "Hi John!" I said.

    No response.

    "Oh, yeah."

    I went to pick up the remote and clicked the unmute button.

    "Hope that helps!"

    Game

    • Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, “Mommy, can little girls have babies?”

    “No,” said his mom, “Of course not.”

    Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, “It’s okay! We can play that game!”

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