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Fleshlight jokes

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Man

7 years ago

A man walked into a fleshlight and died.

  • 0

    • Memes

    Dad

    1 year ago
    A sign that reads: "www.bridgewatercurlingclub.com. You think you can hurt my feelings. I used to hold the fleshlight for my dad."
  • 0

    • Fish

    16 days ago
    A white sign with black text on a dark post. The top of the image has text "Ocean's closed for business". The sign itself has a large bold heading "Please do not fuck the fish" and lists bullet points: "It can make them sick", "They may bite you", "It changes their behaviour", and "There's plenty of squirrels in the forest if you really need a fleshlight". Below the bullet points, it says "Please help protect the fish and keep the marine reserve natural". At the very bottom, it reads "Department of Conservation Te Papa Atawhai". On the left side of the sign, there's a small graphic of a hand holding a fish with a prohibition symbol over it, and text "yeetbob.yeetpants" vertically along the edge.
  • 0

    • Beer

    10 months ago
    A collage of screenshots of Scotty Kilmer's YouTube videos. Each video has a different theme: using fuel additives when one can't afford beer, being drunk, and keeping secrets. The word "Secret" is overlaid twice on two different videos. The word "Drunk" is overlaid on one video.
  • 0

    • Word

    1 year ago
    A photo of two stuffed chicken breasts that look like they are about to burst, sitting on a dirty pan. The top comment says "The stuffed chicken breasts did not go as planned." Additional comments include, "Were you cooking this in the sewer," "Chernobyl fleshlight", and "Guys I found it. The two worst words to put together."
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    • Brain

    1 year ago
    A multi-panel image comparing various fleshlight designs and their corresponding levels of perceived intellect. The first row shows a basic fleshlight next to an image of a simple skull. The second row shows a toy car-shaped fleshlight next to an image of a brain with glowing nodes. The third row shows a worm-shaped fleshlight next to an image of a more detailed brain. The fourth row shows a standard fleshlight next to an image of a head with its brain exposed, shining with light rays. The fifth row shows a Hulk Hogan fleshlight next to a photo of a brain with fractal patterns. The sixth row shows a stuffed-crust pizza-themed fleshlight next to an image of a man's body glowing with energy. The last row shows a pizza and pasta-themed fleshlight next to an image of a spiritual man with energy coming out of his body and hands.
  • 0

    • Event

    7 months ago
    A timeline shows that the most important events in history include the invention of the wheel and fire in the past, and the fleshlight today.
  • 1
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