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Your hairline is so far back that your dad still can't find his way back home.

Why are quantum physicists so poor at sex?

Because when they find the position, they can't find the momentum, and when they have the momentum, they can't find the position.

Your dad died of hunger on the journey to find the milk.

They call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me poor and ugly.

Your grandmother died because she fell on the highest floor of the hotel. Your grandfather died because he got shot while saving your mother. If he didn't save your mother, you wouldn't be here.

You grew up in a world full of viruses. You wanted the virus to be gone. There's only one way, but you have to know it. I can't tell it for you.

Your mother got Covid-19. You prayed and prayed all night, hoping that she would be okay. The next day, the doctors went to your house without your mother. You asked, "Where is my mother?!" The doctors said, "Your mother is gone, so we came here to tell you." The doctors left. Another hour, you were thinking while crying, "Why was my prayer not working? Lord, why'd you let me down?"

You searched on Google "How to bring back the dead." The Google workers declined it. Your father left you because he loved another girl. Your brothers are still with you, but what if they get the virus? Who will be with you?

Don't forget Jesus is still there for you. Don't give up, keep going, and you will succeed soon. You will find your own family and beat the coronavirus.

A woman buys a house, but she doesn't know what to name the house, so she stuck her head outside and heard "Hairy butt," so she named the house Hairy Butt.

The next month she had a baby, but she didn't know what to name him, so she stuck her head outside and heard "Crack," so she named the baby Crack.

After a year or two she lost him, so she called the police and said, "Help! I looked all over my hairy butt, but I couldn't find my little crack."

How do you find out if your kid is gay?

Lock him in a closet and if he comes out, he's gay. If not, he's dead straight.

I'm autistic, and I find these so funny.

Why can't orphans have iPhones?

Because they can't find the home button.

I have a saying. Whenever you find a sink, there's probably a dead baby inside it...

I am disabled and I find these jokes appropriately hilarious.

Why can't an orphan play football? Because they can't find home or return it.

Why can’t Jesus be born in West Virginia?

Because they couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.

Q: Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?

A: To find Pooh!

Hairline so big people had to time travel to find the end of it.

Why did Cleopatra bathe in milk? She couldn’t find a cow tall enough to have a shower.

For dinner, this girl had noodles. The next day, she could not find her skinny sister. The mom said, "Your sister is dead!" sadly. The girl asked, "She was skinny, right?" The mom said yes. The sister laughed, "I ate her! That’s why the noodles were very skinny!"

These days, dating life is hard. You put yourself out there, and it's hard to find someone. The only thing to do is turn to family.

Why should you never give an orphan a phone?

Because they wouldn't be able to find the home button.

Why don’t rappers play hide and seek?

Because good luck finding someone who’s always in the booth!