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Yo mama is so ugly, if she got a pound for every boy that found her unattractive, boys would find her attractive.

Family feud after finding out about Alabama.

The 2nd worst thing that happened to an orphan was finding out the milk man passed.

These days, dating life is hard. You put yourself out there, and it's hard to find someone. The only thing to do is turn to family.

A depressed guy walks into a utensil store and finds a knife, but he didn't stab himself... Part 2 coming out tomorrow.

A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" The dad says, "Well son, let me try to explain it this way: I'm the breadwinner of the family, so let's call me capitalism. Your mother, she's the administrator of the money, so we'll call her the government. We're here to take care of your needs, so we'll call you the people. The nanny, we'll consider her the working class. And your baby brother, we'll call him the future. Now, think about that and see if that makes sense."

The little boy goes off to bed thinking about what dad had said. Later that night, he hears his baby brother crying, so he gets up to check on him. He finds that the baby has soiled his diaper. The little boy goes to his parents' room and finds his mother sound asleep. Not wanting to wake her, he goes to the nanny's room. Finding the door locked, he peeks in the keyhole and sees his father in bed with the nanny. He gives up and goes back to bed.

The next morning, the little boy says to his father, "Dad, I think I understand the concept of politics now." The father says, "Good son, tell me in your own words what you think politics is all about."

The little boy replies, "Well, while capitalism is screwing the working class, the government is sound asleep, the people are being ignored and the future is in deep shit."

How do you find a redneck virgin?

Just look for a 4-year-old. They can run faster than her brothers.

If you have sex and your African parents find out,

“You can do the boom boom. But you can not do the boom boom in my house. Do it somewhere else."

My wife asked me to get her a puppy. I agreed and went to an animal shelter. As I was searching for a puppy, a fire was set, and the entire animal shelter burned down.

A few hours later, I returned to my wife. She knew I had no puppies and asked why. I replied, "I couldn't find any." She understood but was upset, so I gave her something that I did get. She said, "Wow! This is good, what smokehouse did you get this at?"

Yo mama, why do you have to jump in the pool as soon as I can find the water on Mario? I mean, Mario jump to Mars!

How is a beer can and an Indian the same? You can find them both smashed on the side of the road!

If one of ya'll could find my weave, that'd be great!

When you find out your great grandpa killed Hitler.

What gun can’t you find in Africa?

A water gun.

When an orphan takes a photo, it’s also a family portrait!

Btw, if people find these offensive, why are you here? Why are you searching orphan jokes anyway?

How do you find out the price of an emo? You scan his barcode.

What's the difference between my dad and Nemo?

I don't know. I still haven't found them.

Why can’t orphans play baseball?

They can’t find home.

Hey, math:

I’m really tired of trying to find your X. Accept that she’s gone, and solve your own problems, dude!

Last night I remember partying with friends to find blood on my nightstand.

Moments after, I scolded my friends to put my alarm clock back where they found it.