Find jokes

What do we find at the end of every rainbow?

The letter W.

How did Helen Keller's mom punish her? She put her in a circular room and told her to find the corner.

Three blonde girls are on an island, and they are much too far away from land to swim. They find a genie on the island who offers them each one wish. The first girl says, "I wish I was smart enough to get off this island!" So the genie makes her a redheaded girl, she cuts down a tree, makes it into a boat, and proceeds to row off the island.

The next girl says, "I wish I was even smarter than her so I don't have to do so much manual labor!" So she turns into a brunette and makes a sailboat and lets the wind take her off the island.

The final girl says, "I wish I was smarter than both of them!" So she turns into a man and takes the bridge.

You know what pun is used for "waist?"

Nothing. You'll find nothing.

It's just a waste of time.

Do you know Stephen is dead? He doesn't have a stone. Do you know how to find him? A metal detector.

Nemo turned emo and changed his movie name to "Finding Emo."

What is hard to find but easy to make?

An orphan.

Why do violists stand for long periods outside of people's houses? They can't find the key and don't know when to come in.

Lil Johnny looked in his pants and couldn’t find his fish, so he started to yell out, "Lil fishy, lil fishy, lil fishy!" They called child support and sent the parents to jail for putting a fish up a child’s butt.

Your hairline's so far back, you need binoculars to see it.

Man, your hairline is so far back, archaeologists couldn't find it.

Q: What did Darth Vader say to his smashed wristwatch?

A: I find your lack of face disturbing.

POV: You are 7 years old and you find a stick. SWORD.

I went to the shops and still didn’t find Lucy’s dad.

One day my dog died because we couldn't find him. Then we got a cat on the same day. Then my cat went missing, and when I was crying, we heard our Asian neighbor was having a party. Then we went over and I saw my dog and cat on the grill, and they ate them in front of me, saying "yum yum doggy in my tummy and cat in my tummy as well."

Child: Hello, I can’t find my dad.

Stranger: Oh, well when and where did you last see him?

Child: Oh, I remember, 5 years ago he went to get some milk here.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was emotionally distressed after a break up and wanted to find some help at his friend's pen. In the end, he was run over by a car, marking a sad end to what might have been a good chicken's life.

Lilly's hairline was so fat that Charlene could not find it on Roblox.

My friend surprised me for my birthday with a book called ‘Road-Kill Recipes’. I did find some roadkill the other day, so I cooked it according to one recipe and it was delicious. I’m just not sure what I should do with the bicycle.

How can you find out how old a cabbage is?

By looking at its cabbAGE.

Do you know the phrase "One man's trash is another man's treasure"? Wonderful saying, horrible way to find out that you were adopted!