A man walks into a bar and say I'm feeling depressed what do you have to cheer me up? The bartender replied: a shotgun
Are you suicidal? Remember if you ever feel unwanted, just check to see your warrants.
A guy is sitting in a bar, feeling sad. "What's the matter?" asks the bartender.
"My paternal uncle died three months ago."
"Wow! No wonder you're sad!"
"It's not that. He left me a third of his estate."
"Then what's the matter?"
"My maternal uncle died two months ago."
"Two uncles in two months? No wonder you're sad!"
"It's not that either. He left me half of his estate."
"Then what's the matter?"
"My father died last month."
"Your dad too? No wonder you're sad!"
"It's not that. He left me his entire estate."
"Then what's the matter?"
With a massive sob, the guy says, "None of my relatives died this month!"
WHEN YOU FEEL LONELY JUST WATCH A SCARY MOVIE.
YOU WONT FEEL LONELY ANYMORE:(
What are is the best feeling for an Orphan when he playes Grand Theft Auto?
When he is wanted
Cristiano Clapnaldo woke up FEELING DANGEROUS against Real Sociedad 🥶🥶
- 0 tapins 😍😍 - 0 assists 🤩🤩 - 3/3 dives 🤯🤯 - 0 key passes 🥵🥵 - 2 big chances missed 🤡🤡 - 1/4 dribbles 💀💀 - 2 Offsides 😤😤 - 27 claps 👏👏
Better than Elanga? 🥶🥶
Don't you just love wrecking little girl's pussies. Like the tight feeling is just amazing. The great amount ecstasy you feel when you cum and they get all squirmy. It's just the best.
What do you call a cat with two legss instead of four Dead and without use that's what I feel like
COBRA GRINDSET OF THE DAY: Depression isn't real. You feel sad, you move on. You will always be depressed if your life is depressing. Change it. Bitch!
How did the flapjack feel when syrup was drizzled on him?
Butter
i feel bad for the people who died in 2001 those poor terrosists died doing their job.
I never do dark jokes but when i feel like it, i prefer orphan jokes, cos theyre the safest option. I mean what are they gonna do, call their parents?
Johnny: Why do cuss words exist? Mom: That's not something you should think about right now. I'll tell you when you're older. || 20 YEARS LATER || Johnny: Mom now can you tell me why cuss words exist? Mom: Because some people invented them so that they could use them when something annoying happened to them. Johnny: Damn Mom you shoulda told me that when I was still seven cuz now I really feel like that person.
If you ever feel useless... Just remember that If you ever feel useless...
Just remember that it took the US 4 presidents, Trillions of dollars, thousands of lives, and 20 years to replace the Taliban with...
the Taliban
im ashamed to admit feeling proud of the rape joke i posted and what went on between me and your mum
Why do girls play handball? Because they want to feel balls. But then why do boys want to? oh...
Why did a orphan say I'm wanted? because they wanted to feel a lie in their life.
just killed a woman feeling good -Tommyinnit
The FitnessGramTM Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20-meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start. The running speed starts slowly but gets faster each minute after you hear this signal. A single lap should be completed each time you hear this sound. Remember to run in a straight line, and run as long as possible. The second time you fail to complete a lap before the sound, your test is over. The test will begin on the word start. On your mark, get ready, start.
Level 1 Feel it One Two Three Four Five Six Seven; end of level one
My willy was feeling itchy so I decided to go to the doctor. My doctor was foreign, and spoke Spanish with and Argentinian accent. As I returned home, I noticed my willy was gone! Pessi stole my PENis thinking it was a Penalty just so he could statpad. SHAME ON YOU
