Family jokes
If your wife dies of childbirth, can you press charges on the baby?
Did you hear about the cannibal who passed his brother in the woods?
Somebody’s son said, "Mom, my dick has white stuff coming out of it." She said, "Oh, good one, son, so when’s the baby coming?"
I asked my mom if I could be Wednesday (from the Addams family). She said no. She said I would look creepy and weird. She said I HAVE TO BE SOMETHING CUTE. The outfit looked ridiculous. Everyone else looked spooky except for me ;-;.
What does a baby computer call its father? Data.
Kid: Dad, where do you work?
Dad: I.C.U.P.
Kid: HAHAHAH!!!! See you pee.
Why doesn't the orphan date the girl?
Because she is a home-y.
These are bee puns.🐝
I BEElieve you are eager to hear!🐝
I love to BEE a little 9 years old writing on this page.🐝
(Last one) I want to BEEcome a BEE. ;-; I kid... Like this now and please Subscribe to Kelly Qin on YouTube and she is my mom and she has a bake channel!
What's the difference between my girlfriend and my sister?
There is no difference.
How to tell your kid is adopted? Hi Daisy, let's play a game called "You're adopted!" I will start: Your mum died so I had to adopt you, but don't think I love you because you were the only kid there, haha!
How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?
Make him clap until his parents come back.
There was a family, the father's name was Mad, the mother is Brain, the brother's name is Nobody and the sister's name is Everybody.
One day, Nobody killed Everybody, and the father ran to the police's office and screamed, "NOBODY KILLED EVERYBODY!!!!!"
"Sir, are you okay?" The police asked.
"I said, NOBODY KILLED EVERYBODYYYYY!!!!!" The father yelled even louder.
"Are you mad?" The police asked.
"Yes, because my name is Mad!" The father exclaimed.
"Where's your brain?" Asked the police.
"At home because my wife name is Brain," the father said. The police fell down due to the confusion.
Q: Why do orphans like boomerangs?
A: They come back, unlike their parents.
Why can't the orphan go on a field trip?
Because he can't sign the parent's signature.
Boy and girl playing hide and seek... girl: "I found you." Boy: "What gave me away?" Girl: "Ur parents obviously."
Why can orphans travel around so much? They never get homesick.
Sometimes I feel ugly, then I think of my sister and get over it.
We are always joking around about being adopted, when really we are still living in the orphanage.
Funny thing happened today, my dad came home from work which is weird cause he’s a suicide bomber.
You know how in the movie, "Nightmare Before Christmas," they say they're making Christmas?
I thought Mary and Joseph did, but okay.