Family jokes
My grandpa may be a pedo, but at least he slows down in the school car park.
Grandpa said, "No phone near the table," so I said, "You're not allowed near the school."
I still remember my grandpa's last words, "Stop wobbling the ladder, you cunt!"
My Dad said he got me from the shops, and I remembered what Grandpa said about him.
Why don't teachers give orphans homework? Because they can't go home...
One day I was saw a kid sitting on the curb dressed in rags. I asked if he was an orphan. He said, “Yeah, what gave me away?” I said, “His parents.”
My boyfriend's sister is mad because I smashed his girl.
Why can an orphan not do school work?
Because they have to take their work home to their parents.
Mrs. Harolen: Students, tomorrow's assignment is to bring your parents to school for a conference with the teacher information.
Garen: I want to know who cannot bring their parents to a conference. ORPHANS!
Students: Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
Mrs. Harolen: Garen sit down! NOW!
Garen: Hey, why can't orphans get a dog? They don't have their parents to drive them to the animal shelter.
Halen: Yeah! Why are orphans racist? Because they never saw their parents with a different race!
Students: No, that's not funny!
Student: SHUT UP!
Kenny was into incest until his mom died.
Now he's into necrophilia.
Why were the students jealous of the orphan?
He never had any homework!
(I'm going to hell for this)
Teacher: I was an orphan once.
Student: Oof.
Teacher: Who are we missing?
Student: Your parents.
Gina: Ha! YOU HAVE NOTHING!
Orphan: Yes I do.
Gina: What do you have then?
Orphan: Parents.
Gina: LIAR!
What did the orphan say to his parents? Nothing, cause they left him.
Did you hear that Alicia wrecked her Lexus?
It's really a shame. She had to give her dad 3 months worth of blowjobs before he'd pay for it.
Why can’t orphans go to college?
'Cause they have no one to talk to.
Joker gives Batman a phone.
Thomas: "Uhh, son, we need to talk... about the uhh, dressing up."
Martha: "Hello dearie, Brucie, is it ok if you visit me when you go to Joker's house?"
If you punch an orphan, what are they going to do, tell their parents?
If you punch an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
I suck at baseball. I can’t find home plate. Oh wait...