End jokes

Once there were these two fruitcakes driving in their Pink Porsche. "Oh, this handles so well!" they exclaimed.

Then this Mack truck came around the corner at their stop sign and rear-ended them. The passenger said to his partner, "You tell that man he's gonna pay every single cent 'cause we're going to sue him!"

So the flamer gets out and swishes to tell the trucker to do that very thing. The trucker was a tough who said, "What do you want, wimp?" The gay said, "You just hit our new Pink Porsche, and we're gonna make you pay every single cent 'cause we're gonna sue you!"

The trucker said, "Oh yeah? Blow me!" The gay driver went "Ohhh!" and ran back. The gay partner asked him, "What did he say?" His fruitcake driver said, "Ohhh! It's wonderful, he wants to settle out of court!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was emotionally distressed after a break up and wanted to find some help at his friend's pen. In the end, he was run over by a car, marking a sad end to what might have been a good chicken's life.

Once upon a time lived a fat ass named Steve and got rabies and died. The end!

What ended in 1999? 1998.

So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world.

As a 13 year old, online dating is a tough thing.

Every time I meet someone new, they end up in jail.

Two artists had an art contest. It ended in a draw.

What is the difference between a cat and a complex sentence?

A cat has claws at the end of its paws. A complex sentence has a pause at the end of its clause.

Two silk worms got in a fight. It ended in a tie.

What does a robot do at the end of a one night stand? -- He nuts and bolts.

What starts with e, ends with e, and only contains one letter? -- An envelope.

Tits are like Lego bricks. They're there for the kid, but dad ends up playing with them.

Marriage is like a deck of cards.

In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond.

By the end, you wish you had a club and a spade.