Education jokes
Teacher: What does a cow say?
Susie: Moo.
Teacher: Good. Now what does a duck say?
Jimmy: The duck goes quack.
Teacher: Now what does a pig say?
Little Jonny: A pig says, "Get up against the wall, you black motherfucker!"
Why did the orphan go outside the school?
Answer: Because it was take your parents to school day.
The teacher once said to some students, "I was an orphan before your principal hired me."
The students said, "Oof, that is sad."
The teacher tried to ignore them and take attendance. She said, "Is anyone missing?"
The students said, "Your parents."
The teacher got offended and later that day quit her job.
When I was young, I decided to go to a medical school.
At the entrance exam, we were asked to re-arrange letters
'PNEIS'
and form the name of an important human body part which is most useful when erect.
Those who answered 'SPINE' are doctors.
What's yellow but can't swim?
A bus full of children.
Why can't orphans go to a school field trip?
Because he needs the parent's signature.
Average Kid: brings mp3 to school.
Rich Kid: Brings mp4 to school.
Quiet Kid: Brings an mp5.
If you're going shopping at school, what color would I like to smell: True or False?
Why don't the giraffes go to elementary school? Because they are already in high school.
What do elves study in school?
The elf-abet.
Why did the girl study in the tree? She wanted a higher education.
Why did the music teacher need a ladder to reach the really high notes?
Why was the math book so sad? Because it was filled with problems.
What does an orphan do on school parents' day? Nothing.
Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?
Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?
What is green and looks like a school bus?
A school bus.
Why can't orphans go to school? They can't attend parent-teacher conferences.
If the teacher tells you to stand up if you're not gay and there's that one kid in the wheelchair.
There was a new kid in my school. The first thing the teacher said was, "Me, you, the basement NOW!"
Teacher: How many kids are in this classroom?
Kid: 73 if you count the ones you have hid in the basement.