Education jokes
The Good Old Days.
You don't appreciate a lot of stuff in school until you get older. Little things like being spanked every day by a middle-aged woman: Stuff you pay good money for in later life.
My mom said you failed school. I said, "Don't be surprised, I'm a retard, Mom."
What do teachers eat? They eat square stuff.
Spend all night in a dark humor webpage.
Go to an orphanage today and read it to them.
And I'm sure if you go to a school for disabled children, they should understand it.
What do the Twin Towers and school have in common?
People jumped off a building to escape it.
One day this kid says to his dad, "Dad, they bully me at school."
His dad asks why, and the kid says, "They bully me because I got no hands."
Then his dad says, "Who would do such a thing like that? I want to know who they are. Point at them!"
So I became a teacher in a school for disabled children.
A kid wanted to ask me a question, so I told him to stand while he address me. 💀
I teach orphans.
But the problem is I can't give them homework.
Why did the orphan misbehave in school?
Because the principal couldn't call their parents.
Did you know that Helen Keller had a pet monkey?
No.
Neither did she.
A Chinese teacher's phone rang as he was going to class, and he said:
"My phone the ring ring, it's my wife ring ring."
I wish they taught 9/11 at school.
It would make these jokes more explosive. 🧨
Why do orphans not like 1st-5th grade teachers?
Because they have a home room.
What’s yellow and can’t swim?
A school bus full of children.
What are Michael Jackson’s favorite universities?
Brigham Young and Boise State.
Why can’t orphans go on school trips?
Parent's signature: _________
On a scale of Johnny Depp having an erectile dysfunction to Michael Jackson exposing himself in a child day care center, how hard is it to get into Oxford?
The Lenovo computers at school stopped working.
They had to call an archeologist.
Why do orphans go to public schools?
Who's going to homeschool them?
Bro, I’m so pissed. There is always that one kid in the class who the teacher helps. I hate that guy in the wheelchair.