DOE jokes

Why does no one look up at Steven Hawking?

You have to look down to see him.

Why does it get hot after a baseball game?

'Cause all the fans have left.

What does pussy taste like in chocolate cream pie?

Don't ever ask me no damn question like that. I ain't never had no damn chocolate cream pie, you crazy?

Omg wassup dude, why does your hair look just like a young Whoopi Goldberg from "The Color Purple?" Them damn stanky looking corn bread rows on your head; you look like a damn cheetah pet. Che che che cheetah, they available at Wal-Mart, Dollar Tree, Target, and Kroger.

My sister asked me what is dark humor. I asked what does a cannibal call a pregnant woman? "Kinder Surprise!"

Son: Mom, can I borrow $50?

Mom: What? NO WAY! Do you think money grows on trees?

Son: Mom, what is money made of?

Mom: Paper.

Son: Where does paper come from?

Mom: . . .

Q. What kind of school does an ice cream man go to?

A. Sunday school!

Psst! Don't understand? Well, "Sunday" sounds like "Sundae." Get it now? Nope? Sorry. Plus, it's an ice cream homophone joke.

Teacher: What does a cow say?

Susie: Moo.

Teacher: Good. Now what does a duck say?

Jimmy: The duck goes quack.

Teacher: Now what does a pig say?

Little Jonny: A pig says, "Get up against the wall, you black motherfucker!"

Why does it take so long for the pirates to learn the alphabet?

Because they spend years on C! Pirate: A, B, sea?