Do jokes

Asian

What do 9/11 and Covid-19 both have in common?

Asians caused them both!

Sex

Why do people have sex?

Because they like going "Ahhhhhhhhhhh fuck me, bitch, I love you!"

Abortion clinic

Q. What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?

Abortion clinics don't do deliveries.

State

Q. What do you call a rich person who is in a vegetative state?

A. A loaded potato.

Vacuum

Q: What do a prostitute and a vacuum have in common?

A: If they stop sucking, you can smack them until they start again.

Abortion

Q. What do you say when your friend has an abortion?

A. May your baby rest in pieces.

Dog

Why can you rub a dog's nose in their pee when they go on the carpet but when I do the same to an Alzheimer's patient I get fired from the nursing home?

Pimp

When prostitutes misbehave, do their pimps make them stand out on the corner with a "For Rent" sign on their crotch?

Word

A kindergarten teacher asks her students, "Do you know any words that start with P?"

Little Timmy responds with, "Elmo."

Job

Some people don't appreciate what I do for a living.

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