Dining

Dining jokes

Pedophile

  • My girlfriend is 19 and I'm 29. We go out to eat in a restaurant, but the whole time I have to deal with being accused of being a pedo, being called disgusting and disturbed.

    It completely ruined our 10 year anniversary.

  • 18
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    Plate

  • Three guys walk into a room where a man is sitting with an assortment of foods on his plate because it's lunchtime. The guys ask the man to do a favor, and he says, "Sorry guys, I have a lot on my plate!"

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    Mary Poppins

  • Mary Poppins went to a restaurant and ordered cheese, eggs, and cauliflower. When she left, she had written something in the complaint box: "Super cauliflower, eggs, but cheese was quite atrocious." (Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious)

  • 0
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    Date

  • There is a man and a woman on a date.

    The woman asked what kind of things do you love?

    The table starts to lift up on the man's side and the man says sorry.

  • 2
  • Food

  • I ate the last of my Egyptian food, and now I falafel. I don't know why I made that joke. Probably just becuscus.

    Waiter

  • The waiter recommended the rug meal.

    She said it was delicious, but it's a tassle to make.

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    Chicken

  • Me and my cousin went to a restaurant yesterday.

    I ordered my chicken fried, he ordered his chicken alive.

  • 0
  • Karma

  • Hear about the restaurant called karma? There is no menu: You get what you deserve.

  • 3
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