Deutsch jokes

Deutsch: Die, die nichts zu sagen haben, reden viel. Die, die was zu sagen haben, hingegen kaum.

My German girlfriend likes to rate our sex between 1-10.

Last night we tried anal, she kept shouting 9!

That's the best I've done so far.

Did you know that Germany came up with sparkling water?

Who else would think of adding gas?

Did you hear about the German girl being raped by 10 men? She shouted, "nein, nein," so one of them left.

A German went to France for a holiday, and here is the scene. French border staff asked, "Occupation?" The German replied, "No, no, no, just visiting."

A professor was talking about the American dream. Then, he asked the German exchange student if there was a German dream, to which the student replies, "We did, but no one liked it."