Destination jokes
What is a carrot's favorite shop?
The wheelchair store.
Where does a suicide bomber go when he dies?
Everywhere.
Where does a crayon go on vacation? To color-ado.
My parents told me I was born on the highway.
Apparently that’s where most accidents happen.
I just watched a 9/11 documentary on a plane. Man next to me said, "You know we're going to New York, right?" I told him I just wanna know what I got into.
Where did little Lucy go during the bombing?
Everywhere.
Where did George go?
Washington, D.C.
My teacher asked us what sex is. My friend, Bobby, got up and said in a loud, clear voice, "Sex is a temptation caused by a sensation, where a boy puts his location into a woman's destination to increase the population of the next generation. Do you understand my explanation, or do you need a demonstration?" The teacher shot him 23 times before she fainted.
My friend misspelled "Mexico" and got here.
He sucked his sister's poop hole.
You: "Captain, where is this plane going?"
Captain: "New York, 175 Greenwich Street."
I still don't know what's the worst, most dangerous place to take your children on holiday, but, for certain, it's either Vatican City or Neverland Ranch.
Three drunk guys entered a taxi.
The taxi driver knew that they were drunk, so he started the engine and turned it off again. Then said, "We have reached your destination." The first guy gave him money, and the second guy said, "Thank you." The third guy slapped the driver. The driver was shocked, thinking the third drunk knew what he did. But then he asked, "What was that for?" The third guy replied, "Control your speed next time, you nearly killed us!"
Why did the one-handed man cross the road?
To get to the second-hand store!
Where do bunnies go when they're sick?
The hoppital.
Where did JFK go in his car? I am not sure of his intentional destination, but he did go everywhere.
I asked my dad, "Are we there yet?" and he told me, "Don't worry, son, it will be a short ride!"
A man asked his girlfriend what she wanted to eat one night, and she said "Chinese food," so he took her to China. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Indian," so he took her to India. The next night, he asked her again. She said, "Nothin'," so he took her to Africa.
If Stephen Hawking is dying, where do I take him, Currys PC World, or a hospital?
Where does Captain Hook buy his hook?
At a second-hand store.
Where do astronaut cows go to get milk?
The Milky Way!