Circle

Circle Jokes

Pizza

How come pizza boxes are square when the pizza is a circle cut into triangles?

Pizza

What's the similarity between a pepperoni pizza and Freddy Krueger?

They both have red circles on their bodies.

Girl

What do you do when you see a naked dead girl?

Check your map, you're obviously going in circles.

Life

You know it’s called the circle of life? Because there’s no point to it.

Ball

Why is a ball rolling when you put it on a hill?

Because it is circle.

Shape

What do a circle and a sphere have in common?

They're round, and round is a shape.

Car

Little Johnny and little Sally walked in on Mommy and Daddy going at it in the bedroom doggy style. They innocently ask, "Mommy, Daddy what are you doing?"

Mommy says, "Oh, Daddy is just parking his car in Mommy's garage, now go and play."

A few minutes later they hear a blood curdling squeal and run to see what was the matter.

Little Johnny is running in circles squealing and little Sally says, "Well little Johnny was trying to park his car in my garage and he couldn't get the back wheels in so I took the scissors and cut them off."

Foot

Mommy, mommy, why do I keep running around in circles?

Shut up, or I'll nail your other foot to the floor!

Train

Little Johnny got a train set for Christmas. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Alright, you motherfuckers get off here, and you motherfuckers get off here." His mom comes rushing in and says, "Little Johnny, we don’t use that kind of language, go to your room and think about what you did!"

After a few hours, she lets him out of his room. He goes back to play with his train set. He takes it around the circle, parks it at the station, and says, "Okay, you guys get off here, and you guys get off here. And if you have any complaints about the two hour delay, take it up with the bitch in the kitchen."

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  • Pi

    Using Pi, distract that fat kid next to you and copy his answers.

    Planet

    Why do planets circle the sun?

    'Cause they like the game of ring-around-the-rosy.

    Brother

    Brother 2: We have these weird circles on the street! Government is tracking us!!!

    Brother 1: They are just to sense cars so they can change lights. And it's the government.

    Brother 2: Then why are there two in the left turn lane?

    Brother 1: So one car isn't always going left and stopping the others.

    Brother 2: Then why are they one car apart? Oh, to have three people going.

    Brother 1: Correct. When I see one car on the first, I go on the second so my light changes.

    Brother 2: You monster.

    Brother 1: I wonder if they trigger by weight?

    Brother 2: HA. Yo mama would trigger the sensor.

    Brother 1: ARG. It's OUR MAMA you're disrespecting.

    Mother (brother 1): What's going on boys? *looks in mirror* HOLY SH@& SHE IS PRETTY!

    Brother 2: I think you should take your pills.

    Brother 1: Found them.

    *imaginary mother and brother fade away*

    Thank you ELECTROBOOM for inspiring this joke/sh!t. Go subb to him.

    Btw the (1) means it is just imaginary brother one acting like another brother.

    Helen Keller

    How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They put her in a circle room and told her to find the penny in the corner.

    Wood

    You are walking through the woods when you cross a woman who has been raped and beheaded. What is the first thing you do?

    Check your map, you’re obviously going in circles.

    Toilet Paper

    What does the starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?

    Answer: They both circle Ur-Anus looking for Kling-Ons!