Childhood jokes
Little Johnny walked in on his mom in the shower and said, "What's that on your chest, Mom?" Mom said, "Those are my headlights." Johnny: "Oh. What's that in between your legs, Mom?" Mom: "Oh, that's my bush." Johnny: "Oh, OK." Next, he walked in on his dad in the shower. He said, "Dad, what's that in between your legs?" Dad: "Oh, that's my snake." Johnny: "Oh, OK." That night, little Johnny walks in on his parents going at it and said, "Mom, turn on his headlights, there's a snake going in your bush!"
Dad: We are giving your toys to the orphanage.
Kid: Why?
Dad: So you won't get bored.
Dirty Joke: A boy fell in the mud. Clean Joke: He took a bath with bubbles. Dirty Joke: Bubbles was the girl next door.
Good night, sleep tight, wake up bright in the morning light, to do what's right, with all your might.
I was sitting with my little brother when he was about four-ish. He was starting to really like to identify objects for some reason, so he was showing me his toys. He grabbed his toy Mator truck and then pointed to the wheels, saying, “These are wheels.” I said, “Good job, yes they are.” Then he pointed to the bumper and said, “This is a bumper.” Again, I congratulated him. Then, he grabbed the toy’s wire with the hook at the end and said, “And this is a hooker.” I died laughing.
They found water on Mars. Mars:1 Africa:0
What do you get when you put a suicide bomber in a wheel chair? An RC-XD.
What is the difference between an apple and an orphan? Orphans don't get picked.
Q: Why do orphans love boomerangs?
A: Because they actually come back.
What do you call a 5-year-old with no friends?
A Sandy Hook survivor.
You look like a 2 year old drawing that came alive.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
The best thing about an orphan? They don’t have to suffer from "your mama" jokes.
What is an orphan's family reunion called?
Me time.
What do you do when you see a sad orphan?
Nothing, let them wait for their parents.
LBB- me and Shrek built a theme park for you mummy and it’s called Dummy pee pee poo poo doo doo land because Shrek likes to poop.
Shrek- Should I pull the trap?
*LBB’s mom walks into the trap*
LBB and Shrek- surprise we’re mailing you to Peepoo Peepoo AB
The reason why orphans can't play baseball is because they can't find home.
What is the difference between an orphan and an apple?
An apple actually gets picked.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Dark humor is like a kid with cancer. It never gets old.
Why can't orphans play sports?
They don't know what a home team is.
Little Johnny brings his cat to school, and then the teacher asked him why. Little Johnny says, "Because I heard my dad tell my mom I'm going to eat that pussy up when the kids leave!"