What’s an orphan’s favorite beer?
Fosters.
Why do orphans eat cereal with water?
Because their dad left and never came back home with the milk.
I still can’t forget that tiny little dead fish in my blue lunchbox.
Q. What is an orphans favourite game
A. Hide and seek
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
They can't find home.
What does one orphan say to another orphan on Opposite Day? "Do you want to go home?"
Today I got a lecture from my mother, and congratulated her. Why?
Because she managed not to damage me in a physical fashion.
Q. Why do orphans love elevators?
A. Because they're the only things to raise them.
why did the orphan cry when he got back home
because he did not have one
I have a stepladder because my real ladder left when I was just a kid.
Oh wait, I'm thinking of...
When we were kids, we used to be afraid of the dark.
But when we grew up, the electricity bill made us afraid of the light!
What's the same thing between a baby and a grenade?
They both make a sound when thrown.
How to make an orphan BLEED?
Step 1 - Tell them to clap until they actually have a loving family.
Step 2 - LAUGH EVILLY as they BLEED.
Step 3 - Tell them to kys.
Step 4 - Leave that mental asylum.
You know what’s traumatizing?
Your mom breastfeeding in front of you.
Help!
Why are orphans so bad at baseball?
Because they can’t find home.
What do you call an orphan family photo?
A selfie.
But wait, what family? He never had one.
When my son was little, he loved to draw. Although he would always rip up the paper whenever there was one little slip up. Too bad he became a tattoo artist.....
Grew up playing Fruit Ninja on my iPad. Spent time with my online sister playing multiplayer.
Now I play it in school with an awesome small steel blade.
I’m not allowed my phone during school hours and I have to give it in at the start of the day...
What's harder than steel?
Michel Jackson in an orphanage.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They don’t know where home is.
I made a website for orphans, but it doesn't have a home page.
Doctor: I’m going to have to turn you away. Orphan: But why? Doctor: Because I’m a family doctor.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Cause they come back.
Why do orphans become criminals? To know what it’s like to be wanted.
Girls are like rocks; the flat ones get skipped.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite TV show? Family Guy.
If you hit an orphan, what are they going to do? Tell their parents?
If you hit an orphan with a car, at least you don't have to tell their parents.
Why did the orphan go to church? So he had someone to call Father.
What does an orphan call a family photo? A selfie.
Why was the orphan a big success? Cause people say go big or go home, he only had one option.
Why is it ok to hit an orphan? It’s not like they can tell their parents.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite store? Home Depot.
What do orphans and blind kids have in common? They can’t see their parents.
Why can't orphans hear about ancient Egypt? Because they don’t know what a mummy is.
Why are orphans bad at poker? Because they don't know what a full house is.
What do you call a virgin from Alabama? An orphan.
