A cemetery should be built next to orphanages, so the orphans can see their parents.
The cemetery is so overcrowded. People are just dying to get in.
Guy walks to his friends house his friend says “where is your girlfriend” guy says meet me at the cemetery in a week
Look, it’s the dead center of town!
When you at a funeral and you laugh at the body...everyone stares and one person said isn ́t that your mom......?
A man gets on a bus, and ends up sitting next to a very attractive nun. Enamored with her, he asks if he can have sex with her. Naturally, she says no, and gets off the bus. The man goes to the bus driver and asks him if he knows of a way for him to have sex with the nun.
"Well," says the bus driver, "every night at 8 o'clock, she goes to the cemetery to pray. If you dress up as God, I'm sure you could convince her to have sex with you."
The man decides to try it, and dresses up in his best God costume. At eight, he sees the nun and appears before her.
"Oh, God!" she exclaims. "Take me with you!" The man tells the nun that she must first have sex with him to prove her loyalty. The nun says yes, but tells him she prefers anal sex. Before you know it, they're getting down to it, having nasty, grunty, loud sex. After it's over, the man pulls off his God disguise.
"Ha, ha! I'm the man from the bus!"
"Ha, ha!" says the nun, removing her costume. "I'm the bus driver!"
The other day I took my Grandma to one of those fish spas where the little fish eat your dead skin.
It was way cheaper than having her buried in the cemetery.
Theres something special about cemeteries People are dying to get inside
When there’s an earthquake, coffins become underground maracas...
I saw a petition on replacing gravestones with trees so it will be a beautiful forest Son: wheres grandma?
Why do cemeteries have fences around them? People are dying to get in.
So I went to my friends funeral today, As we were all leaving a kid put a get well soon card next to my friends grave ‘poor kid’
GRAVEYARD SAVINGS: While leafing through our local newspaper, I noticed this classified ad: “For sale: one used tombstone. Splendid opportunity for a family named Dingle.”
A sad guy called "nun" is crying next to the grave of his best friend called "month" , "month" got killed by a gay guy and after that "nun" got homophobic.
While "nun" 's sitting next to "month" 's grave he heard a guy asks his friend : 《Do You Wanna Play A Game On ? 》 , "Nun" get angry and he asks that guy : 《 What did you just said to your friend ? 》 , the guy answers : 《 A game on , why ? 》
"Nun" kills the two guys .
🤔
I don't understand why in horror movies they make digging a grave look so easy, It usually takes me days
How many people do you think are in a graveyard? Hopefully none.
A Chinese boy never met his parents after they were killed in WW2, so when he learned where they were buried he quickly rushed there.
He sat down in front of their graves and prayed "I want to see your face again mommy...". A miracle happened, his mother rose up from the graves and hugged him.
The boy cried then said "I want to see you too dad". He looked at his father's grave but nothing happened
Suddenly a Japanese soldier came up behind him and asked "were you looking for me?"
There was an air crash of a Boeing 737 - 800 which can carry around 300 passengers...
It crashed in a cemetery
They recovered 500 bodies
Why did the family get mad at the boy for eating at the funeral?
While trying to season his food, he mistook his cremated grandfather for salt.
Never invest in funerals. It's a dying industry.
