Cant jokes
Do you know why orphans can't get married?
Because they will never get their parents' blessing.
My friend said not to look down on me. I said I can't because I'm shorter than her.
Customer: "Can I get this in a smaller size and a different color?"
Employee: "Ma'am, this is an adoption agency, you can't do that here!"
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't see home.
A man and a giraffe walk into a bar.
After a few drinks, the giraffe falls over and dies. The man begins to walk out when the bartender stops him.
“Hey, you can’t leave that lyin’ there!” The bartender yells out.
The man turns around: “It’s not a lion. It’s a giraffe.”
Why can't Jesus walk on water anymore?
Because he has holes in his feet.
Why can the orphan only buy 1 ice cream cone?
He can't afford a family pack.
Why can't the orphan eat Doritos?
They were all family sized!
Why can't the orphan eat Doritos?
They were all family sized.
Why can't orphans play baseball? They can't run home.
Why can’t orphans use a phone? Because they can't find the home button.
Why can't orphans see their parents?
Because they don't have one!
Why can't orphans be gay? They got no one to call "daddy."
Why can't a kid with ADHD shoot a gun?
Their focus is always off.
I can't believe the suicide hotline put my cousin on hold. They left him hanging.
Your hairline is so [bad] Will Smith can't slap it back in place.
Why can't religious women be raped? Because they are taught to never say no!
I'm throwing an orgy for people on antidepressants.
Let me know if you can't cum.
Why do orphans never wake up in the morning? Their dad can’t wake them up.
Why do orphans hate family-size candy?
Because they can't share it with their family.