Cant jokes
Why can't orphans be gay?
Because they don't have anyone to call "daddy."
Why can't an orphan go to a field trip?
Parent's signature: ___________
Why can't orphans hit a home run?
Because they don't have a home to run to...
Why are midgets constantly thirsty?
They can't reach the drinking fountains.
Why can't orphans play cricket?
'Cause they don't know where the home is.
Why does the kid in the wheelchair get bullied all the time?
Because he can’t stand up for himself.
A dog walked into a tavern and said, “I can’t see a thing. I’ll open this one.” The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
A dog walked into a tavern and said, "I can't see a thing. I'll open this one."
The humor of it is probably related to the Sumer way of life (and has been lost), but the words remain.
Q: Why can't orphans ever win at Yahtzee?
A: Because they can never seem to get a full house.
Why can’t Jesus be born in West Virginia?
Because they couldn’t find three wise men or a virgin.
Why do violists smile when they play? Because ignorance is bliss, and they don't know what can't hurt them.
Why do violists stand for long periods outside of people's houses? They can't find the key and don't know when to come in.
Why is dark spelt with a K and not a C?
Because they can’t see their parents.
What can't an orphan spell?
Home.
Why can't an orphan have an iPad?
They can't find the home button.
Good Evening Twitter, this is your boy EatDatPussy445, and about like 30-45 minutes ago, I beat the f*** out of my dick so god damn hard that I can't even feel my left leg, my left leg has went totally numb. And, my dick has also went totally numb, to the point where it feels f***ing weird when I go and take a piss.
What do gay people call fighting? It can't be beef, so...
Carrots?
Q: Why can emos wear dog collars at school, but people can't wear hats? WTF school!
One day, Little Johnny walks in on his dad getting dressed and asked, "What is that, Daddy?" Dad said, "Oh, that's my snake." The next day, Little Johnny walks in on his mom getting dressed and asks, "What is that?" Mom says, "That's my bushes." The next day, Little Johnny can't sleep, so he goes into his parents' room and asks Dad, "Why is your snake going into Mom's bushes?"
Why did the teenage girls travel in odd-numbered groups?
Because they can't get even.