Cancer jokes
A lady sees a doctor about a tummy ache. After her check up, the Doctor said, “Looks like you’ll be needing nappies in about 9 months time.”
The lady asks, “Am I pregnant?” To which the Doctor replied, “No, you’ve got bowel cancer.”
Question: What’s bald and is in a straight line?
Answer: The cancer ward. 😵😂😂
So I went to the doctor's and the doctor said, "Pick a star sign, any star sign."
So I said, "Aquarius."
And the doctor said, "Nah mate, you've got cancer."
Please stop using this thread. It is cancer.
What’s pink, black and has 17 nipples?
A trash can behind the cancer ward.
Why does cancer kill you? Because it does. 🌝
What do you call a kid with cancer walking through the airport?
•Terminal
There are 4 people in a line. Three stand up and say "We are standing up for cancer," and then there's the one in the wheelchair.
Me and my little brother were playing Call Of Duty. He wasn't doing very good, so I told him so. My brother said to me, "At least I don't have to camp in order to get kills." I then responded with, "I would call you cancer, but at least cancer kills."
What do you call a person with cancer?
A ghost with a body.
What's the difference between me and cancer?
My dad didn't beat cancer.
What do you call a person whose Lymphoma keeps recurring?
A Lymphomaniac.
Cancer is the best thing ever! Hahah, fuck all you cancer patients!
Fuck, my dad has cancer, lol.
Sex.
Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms or legs.
What did the little boy get for Christmas? Cancer.
Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.
Knock knock.....Who’s there... Not the little boy.
What's the same thing between milk and a kid with cancer?
They both have an expiry date.
What did the make-a-wish kid say when the Avengers turn up without Tony Stark?
"We are in the endgame now!"
Carys’s mum has chemo.
What has a kid with cancer and Peter Pan in common?
They will never grow up.