Came back jokes
The weirdest thing happened yesterday. My dad came back from work... He’s a suicide bomber.
April Fool's joke: Go to an orphanage and tell them, "Their parents came back."
I got my COVID test today, it says 50. What does that mean? Also, my IQ test came back positive.
What do a crippled person's legs and the Twin Towers have in common? They both went down and never came back up.
I couldn’t quite remember how to throw a boomerang, but eventually it came back to me.
A girl and a dog were dropped off at an orphanage. Why was she crying before she went in? Because the people came back for their dog.
One time this kid came back from school and said, "Mom I have one good news and one bad news, which one do you wanna hear first?" And his mom said, "Good news please," and the boy said, "I got 100% on my math test today." and his mom gave him a hug, and the boy said, "Now to the bad news, I LIED!"
The twin towers are like my parents, only one came back.
I have a stepladder. My real ladder left for milk and never came back.
I got my blind friend a cheese grater for his birthday. He came back a week later and said it was the most violent book he’s ever read.
I recently found out that my grandma died. We did an autopsy, and the results came back. They were pretty shocking.
We found out that she died............... from an autopsy.
Today, my mom gave me a lecture on how to stay safe during school shootings. When my brother walked past, my mom asked me a question: "What do you think of going through kids' heads during a school shooting?" That's when my brother came back downstairs and said to me and my mom, "Bullets." We don't talk about this anymore.
Why do Black people dip their Oreos in water?
Because daddy never came back home with the milk.
Three guys are stranded with cannibals on an island. The cannibals said, "Each one of you come back with 10 pieces of fruit and shove them up your butt showing no emotion." The first guy came back with 10 apples, and by the second one, he started to grunt, so he was killed and eaten.
The second one came back with cherries, and when he went to put the 10th one in, he started to laugh, so he was killed and eaten. The two guys met in heaven, and the first guy said, "Dude, you were so close. What happened?" The second one said, "I would have made it, but I saw the third guy come back with 10 pineapples!!" 😝😝🤣🤣
I was on the Oregon trail with my friend's brother, Carl. He got cholera, so we threw him off the wagon. When we came back, he was having a seizure and pooping uncontrollably. It was pretty cholerious.
Died and came back a cowboy, I call that reintarnation.
I saw this one quote: "The people who smile the most are covering the most pain." I think this is true, just not with everyone. As I am really depressed and act like myself with my friends, but with my parents and family, I force a smile so they don't worry more than they do.
I did a test for my therapy session to see what level of depression I had. It came back with severe, 22/24, but I asked her to tell my mum it came back as moderate, saying I would tell her that my depression got worse. She went along with it, but I haven't told my mum and I now make things sound like I aren't as messed up as I truly am to my therapist.
Stephen Hawking went on a date and came back with a broken leg. I can't believe she stood him up.
Joe mama so fat she went wearing high heels and came back in flip flops.
My dad went to go get milk. He came back 7 years later, and we had to send him back because he got the wrong milk.