Bone

Bone Jokes

Skeleton

Why did the skeleton not tell jokes? It lost its funny bone. Maybe you should try putting it back.

Heart

Never break someone’s heart, they only have one.

Break their bones instead, they have 206 of them.

  • 5
  • Child

    Have a sink in your house? Eat it.

    Have a mouse in your house? Kill it.

    Have a child in your house? MICROWAVE IT.

    ...just kidding. Now watch this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5tjtUFL0j4

    Feminist

    Sticks and stones may break my bones, but there will always be something that offends feminists.

  • 9
  • Friend

    Why are you so bonely, my friend? I am at least glad that you are not boneless.

    Woman

    What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common?

    By the time you're done with the breasts and the thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.

    Skeleton

    How did the skeleton know it was about to rain?

    "Because he felt it in his bones?"

    No,

    He read the weather app, you idiot.

    Girl

    Hey girl, are you osteoporosis, because you're giving me a "bone" condition.

    Band

    So my brother said we should start a band, and I said I already had a band. So I gave him my band and he said he was talking about music, and I said, "Well, I do have a trum-bone ;)"

    Skeleton

    Teacher: Why did the skeleton know the weather outside?

    Student: 'Cause he could feel it in his bones.

    Teacher: No, he read the weather report, you fucking idiot.

  • 4
  • Skeleton

    What's the difference between a skeleton and a baby? I don't set the skeleton on fire.

  • 2