Blind Man Jokes

Three disabled guys (a blind man, an amputee, and a guy in a wheelchair) are flying back with the USA team from the Paralympic games in the Middle East when their plane crashes in the Sahara Desert. The three disabled guys (the only survivors) are now stranded and wait for someone to rescue them, but no one showed. They start to get real thirsty, so they decide to seek out water. The amputee leads the way, with the blind man pushing the guy in the wheelchair; and, eventually they find an oasis. The amputee leader goes into the water first, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he has a NEW LEG! He gets excited and encourages his friends to do the same.

The blind man offers to push the guy in the wheelchair, but he gets refused because the guy in the chair wants to be Mr. Independent and insists the blind man goes ahead first. So he goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, walks out the other side and lo and behold, he can SEE! Now the guy in the wheelchair's getting really excited, starts pushing with all his might, goes into the water, cools himself down, drinks a load of water, and wheels out the other side. Lo and behold, NEW TIRES!!!

There was a blind man in WWE, and the commentator said, "Watch out! Watch... Oh, he can’t see." After he was sued for national offense.

What did the blind man say on Christmas?

"I can feel your presents!"

What did the mute man tell the blind man?

Nothing.

A woman walks into a supermarket and sees a blind man swinging a dog around in the air. So, the woman walks up to him and asks, "What are you doing?" The man says, "Just having a look around."

What did the blind man say when he walked by the fish store? "Hello Ladies!"

An 80-year-old blind man asks his grandson, "Can you grab my glasses?"

Then the grandson says, "Did you get in the flour again?"

Grandpa said, "No, it was the weed."

What happened to the blind man's son?

He thought he was hitting a piñata.

This is really mean...

A man put a blind man in a circular room and said, "Your dinner's in the corner."

A blind man walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" The bartender replies with, "I'm blonde, the man working next to me is blonde, the woman next to you is blonde, and the fat guy behind you is blonde." Then says, "Do you really wanna tell the blonde joke?" The blind guy responds with, "No, I don't wanna tell it that many times."

What did the blind man fight in the bar?

The coat rack.

A blind man is going for a walk. Eventually, he reaches a fish market.

He yells, "Hello ladies!"

Why could the blind man not see

Answer because he is blind

What did John Cena say to the blind man? "YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"

What is a definition of tight?

A. Putting a blind man in a round room and saying, "Your dinner's in the corner."

why cant the blind man see, because he cant see

What did the deaf man say to the blind man before he fell into the well?

Nothing.

Why did the blind man fall down the well?

He couldn't see that well.

A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a door, and a staircase.

A blind man once told me he smokes a lot because he has nothing to look forward to. Well, let's just say that I see his point.