Ben

Ben Jokes

Solo

Rey: Join me, Ben, you don't have to be alone anymore, join me.

Ben: But Rey, I've always been solo.

Kid

"I'm the big man, catching the kids in my big van." - Ben 2021

Resurrection

What's the difference between MetaCareForAll and the resurrection of our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

One of them is an unrealistic fantasy that can never come true because it wouldn't work. The other one is the resurrection our lord and savior Jesus Christ.

9/11

The British equivalent to 9/11 would be a big red bus crashing into Big Ben.

Democrat

What's the difference between a five-year-old and a Democrat?

The five-year-old doesn't expect you to do everything for them.

(Vote for Ted Cruz, Ben Shapiro 2020)

Leaf

Joe: What do the Leafs and the Titanic have in common?

Ben: I don't know.

Joe: They both look good until they hit the ice.

Big Ben

At first, I didn't like Big Ben, but then I went there and the experience was un-BELL-ievable!

Midnight

It's getting near midnight, and I can already hear Big Ben. He's upstairs pumping the wife.

Knock knock

Me: Knock knock. Bestie: Who's there? Me: Ben. Bestie: Ben Dover? Me: No, Ben vuyictrbjovtfcybugxrrx. Bestie: Omg how did I forget, hi vuyictrbjovtfcybugxrrx!

Flavor

What was Michael Jackson's favorite flavor from Ben and Jerry's? "Schweaty balls," or if you're Michael Joseph Jackson, "tiny balls."

Jeffrey Dahmer

What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to the men he took home that said they were hungry? "I've got Ben and Jerry's in the freezer."

Uncle

Kid's uncle: "Your mum said you can have your friends round tonight! But I'm gonna have to baby sit today."

Kid: "OK THANK YOU."

(AT BED TIME)

Kid: "Please may you stop touching my leg BEN!"

Ben: "I'm not."

(Turns light on) Kid: "UNCLEEEEE STOP SPILLING MILK OVER ME!!!"

Cannibal

"Hey, man, do you have any Ben and Jerry's?"

"Yeah, I have two of them, fresh and preserved in the freezer."

"I meant the ice cream, bro..."

Wrist

What do Ben 10 and a disabled kid have in common? They both slap their wrist.

Bus

Teacher on school bus, "Everybody sit down now, the bus is about to start."

Ben: "Iโ€™m not going to sit down. I donโ€™t want to."

Teacher: "You have to, or else you have to get off the bus."

Teacher: "*stands up*"

Ben: "Then you should get off the bus 'cause you're not sitting."