Bars jokes

Momma

Yo momma is so stupid, she eats cardboard boxes thinking they're chocolate bars.

Scientist

Two scientists walk into a bar. The first one says: "I'll have some H2O."

The second one says: "I'll have some H2O, too." And then he died.

Punch Line

I walk into a bar. There was a line of people waiting to punch me. Yup. That was the punch line.

Blonde

Did you hear about the blonde who walked into a bar?......... It hurt.

Memes

Grasshopper

A grasshopper walked into a bar and sat down at the counter.

The bartender looked at him and said, "We have a drink named after you." The grasshopper replied, "Who names a drink Steve?"

Rapper

What do you get when you cross a rapper with an accountant?

A money manager who counts bars.

Rapper

Why was the rapper so good at math?

Because he knew how to count his bars!

Wife

A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, “WHO THE FUCK FUCKED MY WIFE!”

A man in the back responds, “YOU AIN'T GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!”

Funeral

Ted Bundy walks into a bar wearing all black. The bartender asks, “Whose funeral is it?”

Ted Bundy looks around the room and replies, “I haven’t decided yet.”

Rapper

Why did the rapper bring a ladder to the studio?

Because he wanted to drop higher bars!

Roman

A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a Martinus.

"Don't you mean a martini?" asks the bartender.

The Roman replies, "If I wanted a double, I would have asked for one!"

Bar

Two guys walk into a bar. The third guy ducks.

Be smart, not stupid.