ANS jokes

A vampire goes to the bakery.

Vampire: "One bun, please."

Baker: "But you're a vampire, don't you need blood?"

Vampire: "Yes, there is an accident outside and I need something to dip."

What do you call an adopted orphan?

Wanted.

I saw a kid crying yesterday, so I asked him where his parents were. God, I love working in an orphanage.

What's an Asian's favorite food place?

Answer: Petco

As an actor going to film a new TV show in another country, when TSA asks, "What’s the purpose of your visit?"... "I’m going to shoot a pilot" is never a good answer.

What do you call an emo cancer kid?

Chemo.

What is an Emo's favorite way to Cosplay?

Dress up as a piñata!

What is an orphan's least favorite show?

"Full House."

Why is it ok to hit an orphan?

Because they can't call their parents.

What is the difference between an orphan and a robber?

One is wanted.

What do you call an emo who just crossed the road? Roadkill.

What's the difference between an orphan and an apple?

Apples get picked.

I don't get this. Why is it I go to an orphanage and all of a sudden they said I used to be the cutest baby there?

"You're an orphan forever," - Harry Potter.

I saw an emo orphan by a tree, and I was going to give it a high-five, but instead I just let it hang.

Ever have an Italian sausage in a can?

I asked an orphan where his parents were.

(God, I wish I knew)

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?

Tell them to clap until their parents come home.

On a scale of Johnny Depp having an erectile dysfunction to Michael Jackson exposing himself in a child day care center, how hard is it to get into Oxford?

Go punch an orphan, what are they gonna do? Tell their parents?