And jokes

What’s the best part of fucking Noor’s vulva (btw Noor is black)? If my dick is right beside Mara’s vulva (btw Mara’s white and so am I).

"Hola soy Dora, do you see Donald Trump? That’s right, he’s at my house, and he’s building a wall to separate me and Caillou. And Mami won’t let him, so she was walled alive!"

The ball kept getting bigger and bigger...

And then it hit me.

So recently I hit an orphan with a 2x4, and he started crying. What's he gonna do? Tell his family? XD

I stole my friend's amnesia medication the other day, he was pretty pissed.

But I reminded him of the age-old mantra: "Forgive and forget!"

You know what's the difference between my basement and Chick-fil-A?

A lot of things.

I can't believe this!

Pizza is round and it comes in a square box, and you cut it into a triangle.

Plastic bags look like you, dirty and fake.

What's the difference between a crumbled man and 9/11... nothing, they're both crumbled.

Yo mama's so poor that when I was walking down the street, I saw her kicking the trash can, and I asked, "What are you doing?" She said, "I'm moving!"

If you are a girl and your favorite movie as a kid was Mulan, they successfully made a man out of you.

Yo momma is so fat, I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing!

What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper.

What's the difference between a boomerang and my dad?

The boomerang comes back.

If you text your crush and they leave you on read, just know that "read" has four letters. You know what also has four letters? "Mine." So that basically means that you are theirs. :)

One day, a little boy wrote to Santa Claus,

"Please send me a sibling!"

Santa Claus wrote him back and said, "Okay, send me your mother!"

I made a playlist for hiking. It has music from Peanuts, the Cranberries, and Eminem.

I call it my trail mix.

What do ninjas and depressed people have in common?

They're always cutting.

I saw a kid crying, sitting on the sidewalk, and I asked him where his parents were. He then cried even more. God, I love working at the orphanage.

What is the Mexican's favorite sport?

Cross country, wall climbing, and their favorite activity in the summer is lawn mowing.