And jokes

Four kids at my school tried suicide and failed. They are now known as the Suicide Squad.

How are an orphan and baseball different from each other?

A baseball game has a home run.

Today I asked my phone, Siri, why am I still single?

And I activated the front camera! 😭😭😭😭😭

What do women and screen doors have in common? The more you bang them, the looser they get.

I don't understand why people hate it when they hear a dad joke. They are actually pretty funny, and I will show you Y. (shows a picture of the letter Y)

Q: What's the difference between a prison and a concentration camp?

A: At least you don't die when you shower.

The Ruler of Varvona wanted a fruitcake, but his subjects showed up at his castle with a Christian instead.

And he said: "NO, NO, NO! YOU IMBECILES! NOT THAT KIND OF FRUITCAKE!"

What’s the difference between a Mercedes and a Skoda?

Princess Di wouldn’t be seen dead in the back of a Skoda...

What's the difference between a paralyzed kid and a father?

The father gets to leave, while the kid stays.

What do emos and ninjas both have in common? They both hide and cut things.

I once was playing with my friend and Roblox girlfriend, then one day, they cheated on me. I broke up with her and unfriended him, then I saw my mom and my uncle crying!

Me be like: ;-;

My dad is now a milkman.

Now I have over 50 brothers and sisters.

What does Buzz Lightyear and an orphan's parents have in common?

They go to infinity and beyond.

What's the difference between a blind person and an orphan?

They both can't see their parents.

Two balls sit inside a bucket. One turned to another and said, "Hey man, boing, are you sentient, too?"

The other one said, "I’m sapient, you are sentient!"

BOINGZINGA!?!

Bro, living is so expensive, and I'm not even having fun doing it or getting my money's worth.

Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.

Today, a kid in a wheelchair was rolling around the class to get away from this one annoying kid, so I told him, "Brayden, just get up and walk away."

I got a toaster for my birthday and said, "Yay, new bath bomb!"

I told Siri about my dog, and she told me if she could tell me a joke to cheer me up, and I said okay.

She asked me, "Knock knock." I said, "Who is there?" She said, "Not your dog."