Emmy and thomas sitting in a tree
IM GEORGE WASHINGTON I CANT SPELL TETH OR AMEiciari
My friend asks for a turkey burger on 4th of July. I say "thats thanksgiving man!"
Germany: As long as America stay out of the war we should win. Japan: *bombing pearl harbour* Cowabunga It Is!!
Commander: "Fire a warning shot" Soldier: "Sir, this is a M32 grenade launcher" Commander: "potato, potato, just fire" Soldier: *fires M32 grenade launcher near a pre-school* Commander: "They're trying to run, TAKE THEM DOWN!"
Nasa = Not Africa North America.that what nasa stands for
What to hear a pizza joke? Never mind it’s to chesesy
Your mom walked into a bar and broke all the furniture.
what do you call a best friend that smokes weed?
A pothead. Just because he's your friend, you don't have to support his poor decisions. Jeez, what has America come to?
I entered 10 puns in a pun contest, hoping one would win, but no pun in ten did.
Bippity Boppity Boo Donald Trump is gonna deport you
Here's how to piss off all of North America.
All the United States is, is South Canadia.
3 people died and went to Hell. One of them is from America, the second guy is from Germany, and the third guy is from Afghanistan. The devil lets each person make a phone call to their loved ones in the country they came from but they will be charged. The American spends 10 minutes on the phone and is charged $20. The German spends 12 minutes on the phone and is charged $24. The man from Afghanistan spends half an hour on the phone and is charged nothing. The other two guys asked the devil why. The devil responded: "Local calls are free".
Who are the fastest readers? Nine eleven victims because they fell through 720 stories in under 10 seconds
Sandy Hook is my favorite holiday
The Annoying Orange called Donald Trump a Copycat
In America they was a boy named urhan and he had one hand and a stump and a girl named handa who was a orphan, they had a trial for Boston red socks and they failed because urhan couldn’t stump the ball and handa didn’t know where home was.
whats is a mexicans favorite sport?? Cross country because they dont need to be in America Mexico was made for them
"Why do people call Americans excessive?"
"It was probably because of WWII."
"Oh you mean the war where America responded to the destruction of several ships and a harbor and the deaths of little over a thousand by completely flattening two cities and killing hundreds of thousands of people?"
"You're da bomb!" "No, you're da bomb!"
In America, a compliment. In the Middle East, an argument.
