Adventure

Adventure jokes

Kidnapping

  • Mario: Princess Peach got kidnapped again!

    Luigi: Where did they go?

    Mario: To the left.

    Luigi: Fuck

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  • Pirate

  • Two pirates, Morty and Sol, meet in a bar. Sol has a patch over one eye, a hook for a hand, and a wooden peg leg. “Ye gads, matey,” says Morty. “What happened to ya?” Sol says, “Me pirate ship was attacked, and a lucky shot lopped off me leg. So now I got me a wooden peg.”

    “And yer hand?” asks Marty.

    “When me ship sank, a shark bit me hand off. So now I got me a hook.”

    “OK, but what’s with the eye patch?”

    “I was standin’ on a dock, and the biggest seagull I ever saw poops right in me eye.”

    “But ya don’t go blind from no seagull poop.”

    “True,” says Sol. “But it was me first day with the hook.”

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  • Friend

  • Today, me and my best friend went to the Grand Canyon. He was taking up all the space by the edge, and I told him to back up. R.I.P. to him.