9 jokes
A kid in the back of the class just yelled “Jenga!”
The class was watching a 9/11 documentary.
9/11
Why did the vegetable go to jail?
He kaled a man and stole a 9-carat gold bar.
1, 2 look at your shoes.
3, 4 they look better than yours.
5, 6 you have no friends.
7, 8 you look like a ape.
9, 10 don't you like men?
11, 12 hell naw I like females.
1. Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.
2. Why did the melon jump into the lake? It wanted to be a water-melon.
3. What did the duck say when it bought lipstick? “Put it on my bill.”
4. What do you call a pig that does karate? A pork chop.
5. What has a bed that you can’t sleep in? A river.
6. Why were the teacher’s eyes crossed? She couldn’t control her pupils.
7. What starts with E, ends with E, and has only 1 letter in it? An Envelope.
8. How does the ocean say hello? It waves.
9. What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match.
10. What creature is smarter than a talking parrot? A spelling bee.
11. Which U.S. state has the smallest soft drinks? Minnesota (as in, “mini-soda”).
12. Why couldn’t the leopard play hide and seek? Because he was always spotted.
13. Apparently, you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff.
14. Why did the drum take a nap? It was beat.
15. Where do hamburgers go dancing? They go to the meat-ball.
16. Why did the tomato turn red? It saw the salad dressing.
17. Why shouldn’t you write with a broken pencil? Because it’s pointless.
Memes
How do you turn the Roman numeral IX (9) to a six?
Add the "S."
What do computer programming and 9/11 have in common?
They're both inside jobs.
9/11, am I right?
This kid yelled "Jenga" when we were watching a 9/11 documentary.
9/11
This is so sad, can we hit 50 likes?!
My sister was hitting on my boyfriend. I'm 11, she's 9. She said, "Go f-ck yourself," so I said, "Okay, thanks for the idea!"
Ever notice 9-1-1 (the number for the po-po) is the Great Date (9-11)... Hmmm.
666 + 420 + 911 + 21 = ?
Do it in calculator.
On the 12th day of Christmas Peo Pessi gave to me:
12 tap ins
11 pointless dribbles
10 fixed league titles
9 missed penalties
8-2
6 dives
500 million robbed from Barca
4 UCL semi losses
3 times he blamed Higuain
2 retirements
And a transfer to a farmers league.
I see that you start work at 9am, but your hairline starts at 9:15am.
The last number of your like is the Amogus you get.
1: Amogus trollface
2: Frogus
3: Amogus in 2013
4: Chogus
5: Classic Amogus
6: Wait this isn't Amogus
7: Amogus drip
8: Amog sus
9: Amog stuff
Q: Who are the fastest readers in the world?
A: The 9/11 victims. They went through 20 stories in seconds.
My mom told me we were flying to a building to see my aunt. I wondered, "Are we about to relive 9/11?"
I'm writing a movie about 9/11. It's called "September 11th Two Thousand Fun."
A girl is meeting this Muslim for a date, and she asks him, "So are you Indian?"
And the Muslim goes, "No, bitch, I ain't 7-Eleven, I'm 9/11!"