9 jokes
I don’t make 9/11 jokes; they have a tendency to crash and burn.
Why is 6 afraid of 7?
Because 7 8 9.
Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.
1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.
2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!
Q: What is the difference between two bottles of Whiskey and 2 pretty feminist girls?
A: You don't leave the bottles in the cold and dark forest after you and your 9 friends are finished with them.
What do 9/11 and gender have in common?
They used to be two, and now it's a sensitive topic.
Memes
You want to hear a 9/11 joke?
I bet they did too!
I screamed "Jenga" today when watching the 9/11 documentary.
I hate when people make jokes about the Twin Towers.
My dad died on 9/11. He was a great pilot.
My father died in 9/11. It's such a shame. He was a great pilot. 😔
What's the emergency number, Jimmy?
Jimmy: 9/11!
I don’t usually tell 9/11 jokes, they usually crash and burn.
Why were 9/11 victims so mad?
They ordered three pepperoni pizzas, not two planes!
I would tell a 9/11 joke, but it would probably crash and burn.
I was going to tell a 9/11 joke, but it was really plane.
Why did the people in 9/11 not call 911? Because it would call the pilots.
What type of pizza did the 9/11 victims order? Two planes.
Why is 10 afraid?
Because it’s in the middle of 9/11.
When 9/11 happened, we changed our airport policies. When school shootings happen, we haven't changed anything since the shooting at Columbine in 1999. And we say we want the children to be safe.
USA: "Never forget 9/11."
Brits: "What happened on the 9th of November?"
Roses are red, violets are fine, you'll be the 6 and I'll be the 9.