Yes jokes

I bet Steven Hawking $100 if he could catch me.

As soon as he said yes, I climbed up the stairs.

Raju: How about you, Sunil?

Do you know?

Sanju: Sunil is my long distance

is a brother.

Raju: Long brother?

Sanju: Yes, because I live in Ratnagiri and he lives in Nagpur.

Yes yes yes the yes yes he did but what u tolk xjxfjgjcmbjhdkggdjlud.

Me when my girlfriend comes home, I check her phone and there are 100 texts from a different guy asking her out, and her text says yes.

Get the whip, you're out!

A priest asks a nun if she has slept with anyone, and the nun says, "Yes, a fucking hot girl!"

Stalin asked Hitler if he wants to hear a joke.

Hitler says, “Yes.”

Stalin then says, “Moscow.” Hitler replies with “I don’t get it?”

Stalin laughs for a long time and says, “And you never will.”

Leo be like: "I like men, yes."

A train walks into a bar. It says to the barkeeper, "I'll have a gallon of ale."

"A gallon?" the barkeeper asks.

"Yes," replies the train, "I always end up chugging it."

This guy comes knocking on the door in hell and speaks to God. "Please let me out, it is too cold in here!"

God is all confused. "There is a big fire in there!" The guy answers, "Yes, there is, but you cannot get near it. All the bishops, cardinals, and priests are sitting around it."

"Do you want to hear a joke?"

"Yes."

"Okay, record yourself and then listen to it!"

Do you like In-N-Out?

Yes, why? In and out of your mouth.

My bad, but you stink so bad you passed by a trashcan and it yelled, "Wow! I didn't know I had family!"

My best friend is an orphan, and we try to have sleepovers, but his parents never say yes.

One day I visited my friend in a hospital.

I remember when I spoke, "You know, sometimes it's reaching its peak and its lowest state, but I know you'll always end like the others at calming and straight!"

Yes, I talked about the heart monitor beside him.

Dad: Are you gay?

Kid: Yes.

10 days later.

Kid: I’m going to my girlfriend's house.

Dad: I thought you were gay?

Kid: What’s wrong with you? He’s the girly girl of our relationship, dumba**.

Dad: Don’t swear and okay, bud.

Violence isn't the answer. It's the question, and the answer is yes.

This is a joke. Laugh!

What question can you never answer yes to?

Answer: Are you asleep yet?

Dad: Where is my son?

Son: Come join me with musical chairs, except we stand on them.

Dad: Ok, so do we put this round our neck?

Son: YES!

Mum: AHHHHHHHHHHHH

Teacher: I was an orphan when I was younger.

Student: Oof.

Teacher: Is anyone not here?

Student: Yes, your parents.