So I was on Google, and on my computer it had Windows. When Stephen Hawking died, it shut down, the shutdown sound played, and wouldn't turn on again.
What happens when you see corn looking at you in your window?
A corn stalk!
Fucking Windows updates!
Why was it cold in Stephen Hawking's house?
Because he had a new window open...
Stephen Hawking died because his wife misunderstood him when he said, "My Windows Needs Updating." She had the double glazing removed, and he fell out and died.
What noise does Stephen Hawking make when he dies? Windows shutting down theme tune.
A teacher says to her class one day, "Whoever answers my next question can go home."
A boy throws his bag out the window.
The teacher asks, "Who just threw that?"
The boy says, "Me! I'm going home now."
1 + 1 = window.
The exam is knocking at my door... so I ran away from the window.
Q: Have you ever felt a window?
A: Did you feel the pane?
"Gosh, it's raining cats and dogs," said Suzie, looking out of the kitchen window.
"I know," said her mother, "I've just stepped in a poodle!"
How to make time fly?
Answer: Throw a clock out of the window.
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone chucked a brick at her.
Why did Sally throw a clock out the window? She had brain damage from the brick.
How did the computer get out of the house?
He used windows.
Bill Gates teaches a kindergarten class to count to ten. “Dos, 1, 2, 3, 3.1, 95, 98, ME, 2000, XP, Vista, 7, 8, 8.1, 10.”
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies?
The Windows shutdown sound plays.
Arnold Schwarzenegger was asked if he wanted to upgrade to Windows 10. He replied, "I still love Vista, baby."
Since it started raining, all my wife has done is look sadly through the stupid window. If it gets any worse, I'll have to let her in.
