Why jokes
Why do vegetarians give good head?
Because they’re used to eating nuts.
Why are feminists jealous of men?
Because men don't have to stand up to piss.
Why don't blind people skydive?
Because it scares their dogs too much!
Why do orphans go to church? Because they can finally call someone "father."
A young boy enters a barber shop, and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.
"Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"
The boy licked his cone and replied:
"Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!"
Why do the French eat snails?
They don't like fast food.
Why are there only 363 days in an orphan's calendar? They don't have Father's or Mother's Day.
Why can't two Asians make a white kid?
Because two wongs don't make a white.
Why can't orphans go on school trips?
"Parents signature _________"
Why is the USA bad at Clash Royale? 'Cause they already lost two towers.
Why is the leaning tower of Pizza leaning?
It has better reflexes than the twin towers.
Straight people ask why gays have such a good fashion sense. Baby, we didn’t spend all that time in the closet for nothing.
Why were the Middle Ages called the Dark Ages?
Because there were too many knights.
Me: Have you ever went sky diving?
Friend: No.
Me: Well don't, it sucks.
Friend: Why?
Me: They gave me a parachute and I lived.
Why did the orphan become a prostitute? They wanted someone to call "daddy."
If sex with three people is called a threesome and sex with four people is called a foursome, I guess now it's clear why everyone calls me handsome.
Why are orphans so bad at dodgeball? Because no one misses them.
There are five cows on a farm, one mamma cow and four baby calves. The first baby walks up to the mom and asks, "Momma, why is my name Rose?" The mommy cow replies, "Well honey, a rose petal fell on your head when you were born." The next calf comes up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Lily?" The mother replies, "Because honey, a lily petal fell on your head when you were born." The third baby comes up and asks, "Momma, why is my name Daisy?" The momma cow again replieds, "Well, when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head." The final baby walks over and says, "Huh Ruh Buh Duh!" The momma cow says, "Shut up, Cinderblock!"
Why are priests called father? Because it's too suspicious to call them daddy.
